Do you or your wife travel often for work?

My wife accepted her new job offer, so we are in for a big change.

She has been a hairstylist for 10+ years, but has taken a job as a "Distributor Specialist" for Colorproof. So she will essentially be traveling Mon-Thurs most weeks, sometimes weekends, has to report to California every other month for sales meetings, etc. It's kind of a sales position, but she will also be teaching classes, model prep for hair shows, etc.

Just curious if you find folks have any tips to make the transition easier? I suspect it will be much harder on her than it will for me, since I'll still get to be at home and sleep in my bed every night, etc.

Sorry should have been "spouse, partner, significant other" since not every on here is a guy.

Make sure you know if she's coming home early so you.can kick the side action out and not get busted.

Get some sort of device that can do video chat. Makes it a little easier.

Find something productive to do with your evenings, lest you end up sitting naked on a bean bag eating Cheetos...

FaceTime helped me when I travelled. Other than that, I think you two should work out expectations. When I travelled, it seemed like my wife wanted me to leave work, grab a quick bite then just talk on the phone 'till bedtime. Well, that's horrifically boring. We discussed it and worked something out.

"Ooooooo..... You're soooo lucky you get to travel for work."

It SUCKS.

If the money or potential is worth the aggregation, then it's worth it. After a while your kid says "Mommy, that man's back again"; you've been gone too long.

Have her network, meet people in the field, same line of work; and the possibilities are endless.

I travel last minute about once every 6 weeks

One of those on Thursday night at 5 pm, "We need you in Texas at 8 in the morning"

I enjoy traveling but this style is annoying

I spend about 10% of my time traveling for work which is actually really nice…I get to see the world on the company’s dime without feeling like I’m living out of a suitcase. Big time zone differences can be a challenge as I’ve got two young children…I was in Malaysia a few weeks ago and that put me fifteen hours ahead.

Anyway, “Monday to Thursday most weeks” sounds crushing especially if it includes those big time zone changes.

Advice for her…stay in shape, limit herself to one adult beverage per day, early to bed / early to rise, and insist on keeping the reward points as they’ll add up really fast.

Advice for you…know her schedule so you’re virtually there, and be in a constant state of readiness to go get her if need be.

I used to travel a lot for work. Leave Monday, come back Thursday and do paperwork Friday. 1000-1500 miles of restaurant food and hotels. Understand that the last thing she will want to do when she gets home is go out to dinner or a movie. She is going to want to be home, in her chair, her bed, her table. Save that for Saturday or never. Cook her dinner on Thursdays, make it something she loves and can't get eating out.

My wife never did figure that out.

My wife did it for a couple of years. Fly out at 6 on Monday, come home on Thursday night. She was always in the US so never more than 2 hours time change.

We usually spoke a couple of times a week while she was away, but her days were long so not always. It was more difficult for her for sure, living out of a suitcase is not that much fun. I did make sure to always meet her at the gate when she arrived instead of just sitting in the car.

The biggest con was that she never wanted to leave the house when she got home on the weekend. It also took her a night to settle down after a particularly eventful week.

She learned a number of tips, such as to never book the last flight home. We live in a relatively small town, and so her trips always ended up on a puddle-jumper. If you're booked on the last flight from Denver and you hit weather/mechanical/etc somewhere in your travels, you'll end up missing your flight home. Oh, and stay off US Air, they were by far the least reliable airline in just about every measure.

The pluses? I got a whole lot done on the cars We were able to work in a number of quick weekend vacations where I'd fly to where she was, then we'd split on Monday. That's how she went to the Mitty a couple of years ago, for example. She's got a much different view of the US than she did before as well. The frequent flyer points are great, they did ease the travel as she leveled up - and we flew to Europe and back for free, and got bumped to first class both ways.

The most important thing, however, was that she loved what she was doing. And that made it all worthwhile. She's glad to be home, but no regrets for putting in her time.

Toyman01 wrote: My wife never did figure that out.

+1

When I spend 15hrs in airports on Sunday out or Saturday back in, 12hr days all week, and eat dinner at a taco truck around what my body thinks of as sleepy time... I'm not exactly "Partying it up". When I don't call home the very second I get out of someone else's office... it's not because I'm berkeleying whores or snorting coke off their tits... it's because I needed a run around the park and a shower. Possibly a giant martini and a look at the ocean. OK, maybe just one whore but thats' it. The other one was just an intern learning the ropes. And we only smoked weed. The crank was to stay awake at work the next day... what with the savage hangover and lower back cramps from all that berkeleying at weird angles and stuff.

Wait, what? Who the hell am I here anyway?

My wife travels, on average, early every Monday to late every Thursday; most weeks of the year. It is not easy on us, but certainly not the most difficult thing to imagine either.

I am not sure about advice I can give; I am not sure that we do it all very well. The best part of the scenario is that she loves her job, does good work and I am happy to support her pursuit of happiness.

We only get to talk about 1/2 hour everyday and honesty do not skype or webchat all that often. It is a nice technology but cumbersome to work into her busy schedule. We plan many things both near term and far and try to stick to those plans fairly tightly.

I, being unemployed and disabled, have taken the role of house husband and do all that I can to make sure that all things run smoothly so that she has a nice and peaceful home to return to. A few hobbies and a good pet keep me occupied and happy enough in her absence. I get lonely at times but we tend to make up for it with personal agreements about our own space and an active lifestyle while we are together.

For her, I believe that having the best of all minor conveniences does help her handle the travel. Top notch luggage, high quality wardrobe, luxurious transport, eating well and often, attending social or cultural events and facilities to exercise regularly.

She is very well compensated for her work and it absolutely makes everything work better for us, no doubt. If possible, I advise that you always use all of the support structures that her employer can offer and any advantage you can gain through travel services, mentoring structures, credit card points or travel rewards, etc.. I find it amusing that the more money you make, the more free stuff you get.

Transitioning into this lifestyle was difficult at first in the sense that we both had to work out a system to give each other freedom and still rely on each other to support the other. Honestly, the amount of money we have now was almost unimaginable to us before and that took a whole other set of adjustments, too. If this move is providing well for you or if it presents a hardship, either way you will have to adjust your lifestyle accordingly and in agreement. Open and honest dialogue is of paramount importance.

If she is happy, then find strength in that fact and work hard to support her happiness. Reread that last sentence again, it is important. Do not lose yourself in her pursuits, but work to realign your interests instead of trying to hold onto old positions. We like that life is an adventurous, roller coaster ride that can be fun and scary at the same time.

I remind myself frequently that the absolute best strategy to save yourself from drowning is to simply become the ocean.

Just a quick counterpoint to some other folks experiences:

My wife absolutely loves to go out for a couple of strong drinks or some social gathering without even coming home from the airport sometimes. That is how she recharges and centers herself after coming off a long flight into a different time zone.

Even though I could, I never pick her up at the airport; that job is handled by a professional in a large black car. My job is to be where she wants doing what she wants when that car drops her off; totally her call.

As a pest control tech, if she is going to be staying in hotels, have her learn how to inspect for bedbugs. Lol, first thought I had. Other than that though, good luck to her and you. I'm sure it will take some getting used to. But, it will probably make you appreciate the time you do get together more.

I think it can be refreshing for marriages. I used to travel quite a bit and sorta miss it. We had a deal that when I was on the road, I'd contact her once a week. We don't talk that much when we're together, so what the hell is the phone going to do? Also, it distracts from the tv I'm trying to watch.

slefain wrote: Find something productive to do with your evenings, lest you end up sitting naked on a bean bag eating Cheetos...

You say that like it's a bad thing...

I got nothing for you, but a few tips for your wife.

1. Buy the best rollerboard you can afford - scratch that and buy a Travelpro. Don't ever check it if you can possibly avoid it.

2. Eat(sparingly), sleep, EXERCISE. Restaurant food is really bad for you and it doesn't matter cheap or fancy, both are evil. Business travel and healthful routines are mutually exclusive, for the most part.

3. Pick your favorites and get the reward points. As mentioned before, they add up quickly. You also get perks and special consideration when itineraries go sideways.

4. Itineraries go sideways - get used to it. Always have a contingency plan in case you are stranded. Extra medication, etc.

5. Make time to enjoy the local scene. Go to a game at Wrigley Field. Take the ferry to Block Island. See the Grand Canyon. You're there - shame to miss out.

6. Ambien is your friend.

7. Good luck. Not for everyone.

When I travel for work, it's usually once or twice per month, almost always on weekends, and usually to a race, a swap meet, a car show, to interview someone supremely cool, or to drive something supremely cool.

I'm going to California this weekend to drive/ride in a 900 horsepower 1-mile drag Porsche 997 Turbo...

Yeah, it's awesome.

I'm sorry, what was the question again?

Yeah, what the fox with his head in the snow said.

I would be the traveller in my family, and can say that the perk is that absense makes the heart grow fonder. You come home thursday night and you are pretty much sin-proof as long as you are gone by Monday morning.

Restaurant food is really a form of slow acting poison. I dont know what is in it, but it is universal in North America. I suspect Nitrates.

I have no objection to a cold beer after the day is over, but avoid boozing to any extent. Ditto on the gambling.

I do object to the "Road Warrior" mentality that some employers have where they expect that, since you are on the road all day, you might as well be working in your hotel at nigh. And at the airport and in the plane and maybe a bit on the week-end.

Comunication is important, and you need to become a good listener: When the wife starts speaking of the home as "Her House" its time to park it for a while.

I became a lot more stay at home because of the travell. Partly because I knew better than to wander off with the guys when I was back, and partly because I lost contact with a lot of the guys while travelling!

914Driver wrote: "Ooooooo..... You're soooo lucky you get to travel for work." It SUCKS.

I traveled a lot of the US along with all of the Midwest for 14 years. I had to visit the industrial (old, run down) parts of these cities too - Toledo, Detroit, Akron, Cleveland, Pittsburgh.........

The hotels sucked and I always overate food. Find a way to not let the food become a "reward" for a long day and evening away from the family. Most of our sales guys liked to get back with a giant steak dinner which got old after a while.

We always told the guys to visit and stop and smell the roses once in a while but in reality we were pushed to sell and never had time. I saw a LOT of the OUTSIDES of football and baseball stadiums as I drove by. Try to visit something once in a while.

Collect all the Hotel points at one brand and airline miles as we once went on a 14 day driving East coast trip and used all my points and never paid for a hotel room. That is a small way back my family can feel better about all those nights away.

i've been working out of town every week for 3.5 months.

it was probably rougher on my wife for the fact that she's been on her own with a 2 year old and a job of her own. it sucked being away from them but all i had time to think about was work and sleep.

Thanks for all the insight gents!

I've spent my time traveling... the globe... not quite a "million miler" on Delta, but that is because all my flights to Australia were on Qantas.

Business travel is hard, and rewarding, never sexy or exciting. One of the hardest things is the exhaustion, traveling (just getting there and back) takes a lot out of you. Whether by plane, or car (surprisingly, the trains in Europe didn't really bother me too much). Eating good/healthy becomes nearly impossible. Ummm...

On the positive side, you become an expert at travel and if ever selected would probably dominate "The Amazing Race"

Datsun310Guy wrote: Collect all the Hotel points at one brand and airline miles as we once went on a 14 day driving East coast trip and used all my points and never paid for a hotel room. That is a small way back my family can feel better about all those nights away.

This! My week long honeymoon in Maui cost me $25 (just to redeem miles).

Bose noise-cancelling headphones make a big difference in staying fresh on trips. Either that or some good old custom earplugs. Planes can be awfully noisy.