FJ40Jim
FJ40Jim Reader
11/28/23 5:21 p.m.

Waiting on a box of hardware from McMaster to complete some outgoing orders to my customers. This morning UPS tracking said "delivery by 1pm", which I knew was bullE36 M3 since they always drop mine off 3-6pm. Checked after lunch and it said "delivery 5-8pm". OK, that's plausible. Checked again at a few minutes past 5pm, and it now says "delivery attempted, recipient unavailable, redeliver tomorrow."

A.) I am here, been here all day, waiting on this box,

and B.) No signature required, just a worthless box of bolts, like the other 50x a year from Mcmaster. I know it's the holidaze, etc. but just say it will be delivered after 5pm, then throw it out of the truck onto my drive like normal.

Peabody
Peabody MegaDork
11/28/23 5:32 p.m.

I thought I'd been doing the right thing looking after Mom and Stepdad, as she had dementia, and he was well into his 90's and not mentally or physically capable. They were very appreciative, which was rewarding.

Mom was in hospital undergoing assessment for her dementia and waiting for acceptance to a home. Stepdad died and we didn't find out for seven months as we had been denied access to the home, which was half my Mom's. We had legal recourse, but didn't think it was worth it at the time.

Mom was entitled to his excellent pension and the pension people have been fighting us since we found out.

Somehow, in the time we were locked out of the home, the guy who could barely function on his own managed to change his will, excluding my Mom, and leaving everything to a family member he had specifically removed due to some previous malfeasance.

That step relative has been trying to sue us (my Mom, and by association,  me)  for $200,000 she alleges Mom stole. That has been ongoing for almost two years, which, of course I have to deal with.

That same person called the big city police and accused me of abusing Stepdad and stealing hundreds of thousands of dollars from him. I was investigated, and cleared.

We managed to sell the house, but my Mom died the day before closing which meant my POA did as well.  So I had to pay for probate, and rush it through, as we were fortunate to sell when we did. The market here, especially for dated and little homes is DEAD. Fortunately it went through, and the house sold, no thanks for the lawyer who I would characterize as an expensive, semi useless,  spineless piece of E36 M3.

Step relative is now fighting us over house related bills for the time between when he died, and it sold. We had no access, and she has admitted to living there.

I am the executor for Mom's will, which is a job in itself. One family member is excluded, which there's reason for, and I'm already sensing flack from a different family member over the distribution.

I have since found out that the home screwed up my Mom's medication in the two weeks before she died.  Of course it's not their fault, and nobody wants to accept responsibility. I requested a meeting with them and I don't think any of them expected me to come so well prepared, nor to hammer them the way I did. The doctor  (legit not his fault) has called me a half dozen times to apologize on their behalf for how poorly they acted in the meeting. We're not done there yet.

I'm sure I forgot a few things, but I am currently dealing through three lawyers, and a paralegal, which is plenty, thank you.

And now it's snowing.

 

 

 

 

 

RevRico
RevRico MegaDork
11/28/23 6:23 p.m.

Down 12 pounds since last Wednesday. Thanks kiddo. Wish I'd have weighed in last Monday when whatever the hell this is started.

volvoclearinghouse
volvoclearinghouse UltimaDork
11/28/23 9:51 p.m.

Put the tree up yesterday, go to put the star topper on it and it won't light up. I pulled it apart and the light sockets are all crumbly and dry rotted. Today, Mrc VCH had to run out to get a chip in the windshield of her Traverse fixed (it was the recipient of a tossed rock on the drive back from my parents' house) so I asked her to pick up a new star for the tree. 

I wanted a simple, lit star, the kind that plugs into the end of the Christmas lights. No flashing lights, no playing music, just a pretty little star tree topper.

Mrs VCH goes to Tar-jay after the windshield repair and finds a star she likes, and fits my criteria. Unfortunately, apparently everyone else liked it, too. Sold out. In store and online. Thus marks the beginning of a 2 hour quest, with multiple side- adventures, to find a star. 

She returned home bearing many other sundry items she had purchased. But no star. She's been on the couch for an hour now on her phone, looking for stars. Some she has texted me. One was really pretty. But...it used batteries, and had some sort of a remote, a US berkeleying B port for some reason, only God knows why.  No. Nope.  'N' to the 'O'.  NO.  

Why is every berkeleying thing so berkeleying complicated??????  This E36 M3 is berkeleying ridiculous.  

I want a star. It should berkeleying light up when I plug in the rest of the berkeleying tree.  It should sit there and look pretty, stay lit, do berkeleying nothing else, and then, when I unplug the berkeleying tree, it should go the berkeley off.  

barefootcyborg5000
barefootcyborg5000 UltimaDork
11/28/23 10:07 p.m.

In reply to volvoclearinghouse :

Got a 3D printer? Seems a thin print and a cheap LED socket light might be the answer. Or a thin plastic star and a little GRM magic with a step drill. Make one. 

Floating Doc (Forum Supporter)
Floating Doc (Forum Supporter) UltimaDork
11/28/23 11:42 p.m.

In reply to Peabody :

I'd say that isn't a minor rant. I've been in a similar situation, although there weren't any assets left after my dad died. My brother had already wiped out everything. Reading your post made me realize how much worse it actually could have been if there was anything left. 
 

I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. 

 

volvoclearinghouse
volvoclearinghouse UltimaDork
11/29/23 8:45 a.m.
barefootcyborg5000 said:

In reply to volvoclearinghouse :

Got a 3D printer? Seems a thin print and a cheap LED socket light might be the answer. Or a thin plastic star and a little GRM magic with a step drill. Make one. 

That seems like an awful lot of work for what $10 ought to accomplish at the store.  Anyway, Mrs. VCH did finally buy a star last night.  So we'll see how awful it is when it arrives.  I have no idea what she bought.  

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
11/29/23 9:09 a.m.

Getting ready for vacation week before thanksgiving. Bathroom vent fan dies in the master bath. Gah. One of the guys we're vacationing with has an in, so I call him and get a discount on one, and he can bring it with him.

Two days later the kids bathroom bathroom vent fan dies. I call again and get another from the same guy ordered. Gah. Oh well, they are both 1998 original with probably the same usage. Fine. Annoying and expensive and time consuming, but fine.

 

Get back from vacation, microwave is dead. Tunawife needs one to disinfect her sinus rinse stuff. I do a dance to disinfect, order a new one from Lowes and pick it up on Monday. Annoying time consuming and expensive, but fine.

 

Two days later the new microwave is acting up, heating things intermittently. I'm on hold with Lowes right now, because a "major appliace" only has a 48 hour return policy before they invoke the warranty and I have to have a tech come to the house to agree that my microwave is broken in a few weeks.

mtn
mtn MegaDork
11/29/23 9:21 a.m.

In reply to tuna55 :

Any chance that you've got an issue with the power coming into the house? Grounding issue or something? This sounds like you've had 3 and maybe 4 electrical devices fail in short order. 

I'd at least break out the multimeter and check the voltage. 

Duke
Duke MegaDork
11/29/23 9:26 a.m.

In reply to Peabody :

Wuff, that is far from a minor rant.  I'm so sorry you're going through all this.

DW's father had remarried after her mother's death (somewhat out of the blue).  We can only assume that his second wife - I refuse to call her "stepmother" - had an agenda all along, because as he developed dementia, she took him for everything.  She had a batch of no-account adult children, too.  It was hard and painful but at least she didn't try to sue us.  The laws in their state (PA) definitely favor the aggressor in these cases, so we tried to fight, but it was hopeless.

Best of luck to you, man.  No good deed goes unpunished.

 

RevRico
RevRico MegaDork
11/29/23 9:28 a.m.

In reply to mtn :

I think you're on to something, I seem to remember a big thread of confusing electrical issues in the not so distant past. 

Peabody
Peabody MegaDork
11/29/23 9:53 a.m.

In reply to Duke :

Yes, it's been a non stop assault going on two years, and I'm sure I've forgotten a few things, and I left out some other details. Whenever you think you're moving forward, or you're going to get some relief, someone hits you with another new lousy situation. Fortunately two of the three lawyers are very good and the paralegal has been exceptionally helpful. I actually felt like a failure engaging her to help with the pension, which may finally be over now, but at some point I realized that I was overwhelmed and couldn't keep up. And now the will situation. There are considerable assets, and I'm anticipating that it's not going to be easy. Of course, I'll be in the middle, and ultimately responsible for dealing with it.

SV reX
SV reX MegaDork
11/29/23 10:03 a.m.

In reply to Peabody :

I'm sorry you are going through this

eastsideTim
eastsideTim UltimaDork
11/29/23 10:04 a.m.
mtn said:

In reply to tuna55 :

Any chance that you've got an issue with the power coming into the house? Grounding issue or something? This sounds like you've had 3 and maybe 4 electrical devices fail in short order. 

I'd at least break out the multimeter and check the voltage. 

I had issues in part of my house at one point and it turned out I had a few circuit breakers starting to go bad.  I got lucky, though, and was only going through light bulbs more quickly than I should have been.

 

My rant - I have forgotten what it is like to not feel overwhelmed and incompetent.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
11/29/23 10:13 a.m.
RevRico said:

In reply to mtn :

I think you're on to something, I seem to remember a big thread of confusing electrical issues in the not so distant past. 

Yup, but they were fixed. We replaced the main breaker. 

Jesse Ransom
Jesse Ransom UltimaDork
11/29/23 10:13 a.m.

In reply to Peabody :

I'm sorry; that's a deeply wretched situation.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
11/29/23 10:18 a.m.
tuna55 said:

Getting ready for vacation week before thanksgiving. Bathroom vent fan dies in the master bath. Gah. One of the guys we're vacationing with has an in, so I call him and get a discount on one, and he can bring it with him.

Two days later the kids bathroom bathroom vent fan dies. I call again and get another from the same guy ordered. Gah. Oh well, they are both 1998 original with probably the same usage. Fine. Annoying and expensive and time consuming, but fine.

 

Get back from vacation, microwave is dead. Tunawife needs one to disinfect her sinus rinse stuff. I do a dance to disinfect, order a new one from Lowes and pick it up on Monday. Annoying time consuming and expensive, but fine.

 

Two days later the new microwave is acting up, heating things intermittently. I'm on hold with Lowes right now, because a "major appliace" only has a 48 hour return policy before they invoke the warranty and I have to have a tech come to the house to agree that my microwave is broken in a few weeks.

Tried to call Tunawife to tell her the news about Lowes.

 

Her phone is broken. Again. Expensive Iphone.

barefootcyborg5000
barefootcyborg5000 UltimaDork
11/29/23 10:21 a.m.

Fedex

fasted58
fasted58 MegaDork
11/29/23 7:57 p.m.

In reply to Peabody :

Geezus, you were dealt a plate full of steaming E36 M3. Sad to say you find out who people really are when it comes to estates. It sucks.

I'm executor of Dad's estate. I agreed to be executor after my parents asked me, no problem. From what I know now I wouldn't have accepted. No infighting here but main problem is lack of help, I do 90+% of the work here. I retired in 2020 but spend half my time at Dad's house, so pretty much no retirement.

Good luck with your ordeal, you're a good man.

johndej
johndej SuperDork
11/29/23 9:57 p.m.

Could go in minor win as HK is dead,

Once you’ve been to Cambodia, you’ll never stop wanting to beat Henry Kissinger to death with your bare hands. You will never again be able to open a newspaper and read about that treacherous, prevaricating, murderous scumbag sitting down for a nice chat with Charlie Rose or attending some black-tie affair for a new glossy magazine without choking. Witness what Henry did in Cambodia – the fruits of his genius for statesmanship – and you will never understand why he’s not sitting in the dock at The Hague next to Milošević.

Anthony Bourdain

Puddy46
Puddy46 Reader
11/30/23 2:37 a.m.

Friend of mine revealed to me tonight he has a gambling problem, and is in over his head.  Like way in over his head.  Tomorrow we're going to find a professional that he can talk to, because I am not equipped to do anything more than be a buddy.  I don't know where to begin.  I don't even know what direction to point him in to get qualified help.  

Appleseed
Appleseed MegaDork
11/30/23 2:57 a.m.

In reply to Puddy46 :

It's a step in the right direction.

Duke
Duke MegaDork
11/30/23 6:14 a.m.

In reply to Puddy46 :

Just being in a position where he could open up to you, listening to him, and being moral support is a huge beginning already.

Your state probably has a help line - they definitely do if you have casinos or OTB there. Look into the local health and human services department.

Good luck to you both.

 

Scotty Con Queso
Scotty Con Queso UltraDork
11/30/23 7:08 a.m.

"At a minimum, we'd expect you to work 60 hours a week plus one weekend day but most of your work weeks will be ~70 hours with an occasional 80+ week during busy season." 

Look I get it some people work that much because they have to in order to support their family. I'm a salaried professional who wouldn't typically get overtime. So, you're asking me to 100% sacrifice any time I'd be spending with my family to come work for you. I don't think I'm unreasonable for wanting to work a 40-50 (max) work week to live a happy fulfilling life. 

4cylndrfury
4cylndrfury MegaDork
11/30/23 7:11 a.m.

In the last 12 hours i learned that my father is back in the hospital with a-fib, and the house that my cousin, her husband, and 4 kiddos under 8 live in just burned to the ground from a nat-gas explosion. SIlver lining is everyone is going to be OK, even the cousins pup, so at least theres that.

 

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