old topic revisited: new furball

I owe my dog an apology.

Three and a half years ago, adding my $.02 to a discussion labeled new furball, I posted this comment:

grtechguy wrote: I miss my dog, need to get another.

Want mine? Our dog was my wife's idea. Winter: Snow, ice, -20F wind chill, who walks him? Summer: No matter if I'm on a ladder cleaning gutters, under the car banging on a stuck bolt in the middle of a brake overhaul on her car... "Honey, the dog needs to go out, will you walk him?" I love other people's dogs.

Over the years, in spite of my incessant griping, Tucker, our handsome brown and white Springer Spaniel, became my dog. He followed me around the house. He gave me the joyous wagging tail greeting when I came home from work.

Last year, he developed a crippling condition (spinal stenosis). He walked with great difficulty and probably more pain than he showed. I carried him up and down stairs. He struggled through five-minute walks where before we could walk for hours.

The vet recommended a cat scan. We pulled $2500 out of our retirement savings. The results indicated surgery. We tapped our retirement funds again, $4500 this time. (I've been out of work for over two years, that's the only way we could do it.)

The surgery had an 80% success rate. Tucker fell in the 20% failure rate. In spite of heroic efforts by his surgeon (three surgeries in an effort to put our dog back together), Tucker became a limp bag of bones, unable to move. We held him as the surgeon put him down on January 18.

I wept like a child.

Four days after putting down Tucker, we got a new furball because the wife and I are addicted to the energy dogs bring to our home. Emma is lovely, gentle, smart, graceful, a fabulous mixed breed (half German Shepherd, half Border Collie). But she likes my wife better than me; after three months Emma still shies away when I come near.

My eyes mist up and my throat tightens whenever I think of Tucker. Dammit, it's happening again as I write this.

If some part of Tucker's soul remains as a coherent entity in this universe, I ask him to forgive the sarcasm of that comment.

I really don't have to ask. Dogs never lie about love. I know Tucker loved me and would forgive me, no matter what I wrote. But I still ask because I'm human, a creature capable of sarcasm and deceit, a creature that needs to be forgiven.

Tucker, I would give another $7000 to have you back.

Here's my best friend. He was my wife's dog from before I met her. Now he's my buddy. We had to have his left eyeball removed due to multiple issues--he's much better without it.

I'll bawl like a baby when he goes. He's 14 years old, and sometimes he gets confused. He's totally deaf and his remaining eye isn't the best, but he's still the best dog in the world.

I know what you're saying all too well - and it was well said.

I think every dog person has that One, the benchmark against which all other dogs are measured. One dog of my family's that we had from when I was about 12-22 was that One, the Best Dog Ever. And then the first dog my girlfriend and I got about a year ago in early spring has already come astoundingly close to clearing that lofty bar.

Don't worry, the new pooch will warm up to you. For the most part, you get out of dogs what you give. They're a furry, four-legged window into their owners' personality.

Glad I'm on a weird schedule today so I can hug my pooches before I leave for work after reading this post.

Bandit has been our Husky for 5 years now. Hes fun and energetic, and loves us. Hes a wonderful friend, if not a bit aloof (as most huskys are...)and still a goofy pup despite his 35 people years . Unfortunately hes epileptic, and also has a nervous condition. Seizures in the middle of the night and uncontrolled outbreaks of manic activity at 4 am kind of suck. His meds and vet appts and other costs are pretty high. But when hes in a sweet mood or decides he wants to hang around with ya, his love can be as palpable as the keyboard you type on. Its worth every penny