Hello!
Perhaps some of you might enjoy reading the below African "Indiana Jones" adventure! Both vehicles, in the below story, can be viewed at: www.photobucket.com/piers
Oh, and if any of you know any TV producers looking for an exciting TV show/doccie, tell them to get in touch! Ireland / Canada have a co-development funding agreement! (www.ifb.ie)
The Celt!
"The Burb in the Bush"
On a recent South African "safari" up near the Cullinan mine, where the famous "Star of Africa diamond was discovered in 1905, I found my own "diamond in the rough"- a rare left hand drive, 5-7 seater '61 Chevrolet Suburban. Incredibly, after lying out under the harsh African sun for the last 30 years, the body had only minor, surface rust. Granted it needed a bit of work but the only thing that really concerned me was the badly damaged, (yellow/black) curved windscreen. The owner, Monty (83), a sun baked, wily African Boer offered to sell it to me. Somewhat amused, I told him I'd think it over. and continued on my quest to track down another elusive classic - a '35 Chevy Pick Up.
On route up to the Namibian border, I took a detour to check out a rare '53 Chevy hearse, gathering dust in a local funeral parlour. This hearse looked like something you'd see in an early Bond film or used to "voodoo" terrorize Haitians by Papa Doc's dreaded secret police, the Ton ton Macute. After discovering I was an Irishman and not a "Brit" (these guys have long memories of the Anglo-Boer war!) Monty chilled and agreed to sell me the vehicle. I knew this '53 weather beaten hearse wouldn't be a problem to rent out as a movie "prop" vehicle on a Cape Town shoot and would certainly compliment my other movie "prop" classics. Another idea flashed into my head. Maybe I'd paint black / cream, approach Guinness (my favourite drink) about launching a unique marketing campaign. "Dead on Time" wouldn't be a bad slogan!
Driving through the sweltering Namibian desert, my thoughts kept returning to that "burb in the bush". As a Chevrolet enthusiast, I just couldn't leave it there to "RIP" (rust in peace!) This old classic had plenty of life left in it. A few hours later, I arrived at the Namibian coastal town of Luederitz and headed to a bar to enjoy a couple of ice-cold "Windhoeks" Locals named the area the Skeleton Coast because of all the shipwrecks washed up during the early morning fog. It was also a heavily restricted diamond area where everyone entering had to have a special pass and X-rayed when they left. Who knows, if I hung around long enough, maybe I'd run into someone with a few sparklers to flog!
I was still thinking about Monty's "burb" when I got an even better idea. Why not make a TV doccie or a road movie tracking down old African "bush" classics on route to Kenya? Over another "Windhoek", I began to hatch a plan. It wouldn't be a problem to transport the "burb" 1800 kms back to Cape Town, fix it up, kit it out but still keep that weather- beaten paint job. After all, this was a '61 African rugged Chevy about to journey over thousands of pot holed, dusty roads. The last thing I wanted was a lot of shady characters checking out my shiny Chev only to scarper with a lot of expensive film equipment. Nope, better to blend in with the surroundings and keep a low profile! In fact, come to think of it, a much better idea would be take both vehicles. The "burb could carry a small crew. The advantage with the hearse is that I could play on the African's fear of "muti" or black magic. I figured if I added a few props, it would make a perfect "mutimobile". Hang a few bones / herbs around the windows, throw in a coffin and I doubt if any African or border guard would go near my wheels. Stashing my film equipment inside a coffin was pure genius - my Art Department days were finally beginning to pay off !
The adventure would begin in Cape Town, up through South Africa, into Botswana, through the Okavanga Delta and on up to Vic Falls. Who knows maybe I'd take a shortcut into Zim and check out what Mugabe had stashed in his garage! From Zim I'd follow the Zambesi, stopping to check out the many elephants and rhinos, then on through Zambia / Malawi into the magical Serengeti and finally into Kenya. In Nairobi, I could do all the post production at a friend's film studio and then concentrate on pre-selling this exciting doccie to TV networks like National Geographic, BBC and so on. Who knows, maybe even ship the "burg" over to Argentina, head over the Andes into Chile and up through Central America! Come to think of it, maybe shipping the "burb" out of Mombasa wouldn't be too cool what with all those pirates hanging about off the Kenyan coast.... The "burb" might end up ferrying a load of AK-47 pirates around Somalia which wouldn't exactly be in my plans!
With all this doom/gloom about, viewers want to be uplifted and entertained. Here was a true life, action packed adventure - a cool, rugged, weather-beaten vehicle, spectacular scenery, amazing wildlife, unusual classics and interesting characters to interview about their cars / lives. I had the time, passion, experience, energy and after 6 years working in the Cape Town film industry, it wouldn't be difficult to round up a motley crew of 3/4! Any adventurous investors out there?
"Life's a journey, not a destination!"
Update:
Just heard via the "bush" radio that some cheeky "doff" African has ripped off the "burb" but hey, it's the only lhd '61 Suburban in South Africa. Now how hard can that be for the Celt to find? I'm ready, are you!
fitzwinslow@mail.com
