we have a winner it was teh MAF. there should be a diode on this side, you can see the connectors and the imprint on the plastic for it. locally it was about a hundred bucks because its a 2003+. vw changed from hot wire to hot film in 2003. the earlier one is cheap cheap cheap. my 11 year old did most of the work except for a rusted heat shield screw on the air box.
i still hear a sucking sound so i must have a leak still but htis was the killer. i cannot get more than one finger on the PCV, and I would be $122 that the problem is in that circuit.
do people take of the intake manifold to get to it?