After a few years of a downward trend amplified by "the Rona" (and all the associated good times) at 49 I'm ready to get better. Gonna try some Lexapro. Eyes wide open on this one - I've read a lot of scary E36 M3 about drugs like this. But I needed something and my doc thinks this will help. Wish me luck. Or pull my finger or something.
In reply to OHSCrifle :
My wife tried it a few years ago and called it like putting on glasses. She sees the world in a different light snd her anxiety has improved greatly.
In reply to OHSCrifle :
Good luck, I broke down and asked for something last month and was prescribed Buspirone. It's mild so it's doing a good job of taking the edge off without the side effects some other stuff I took.
In reply to Wally (Forum Supporter) :
Thanks Wally. I'm happy that's working for you.
wheelsmithy (Joe-with-an-L) (Forum Supporter) said:In reply to AngryCorvair (Forum Supporter) :
Ever consider changing your handle to Friendly Corvair?
Hang in there people. We're in this together.
Look at it like calling the big guy "tiny."
Huge cool offer there A. C.!
In reply to OHSCrifle :
A mild dose of Lexapro actually does good for me. I still have to do the "heavy lifting" myself to get out of my depressions, but it helps a bit. Actually, in my case, the "down" feeling is a bit worse, but the anger and anxiety are WAY better. Without anything I'm too angry to be depressed... but I'm NOT a very nice person to have to be around!
Today was a bad one. Stared at the ceiling for a hour. Maybe more. Obsessing over bad E36 M3 that happened 6 months ago. New information that should make me feel better or at least more justified in my actions. But it hasn't. Tumbling down the hole of shoulda, sposta, mighta.
Jesus, this is hard.
I know I'm chimming in late but, a lot of different things can help change your mind set. This past year has been among the hardest of my life and little of it had to do with the virus. months of isolation definitely showed me that even though I'm an introvert I definitely need interaction. My inability to focus on short term goals rarely allows me to live in or enjoy the present.. Anyways, some of the things that help me cope/break the cycle of self lotheing are.
Exercise, well more like walks in the woods preferably to somewhere with a stunning view. The quite peaceful woods are incredibly relaxing to me and an aww inspiring view can help to see the bigger picture.
Socializing with friends/family. Yes I know this isn't the easiest or most socially acceptable currently but.. berk it. A small circle is better than none and can help draw you out of a lull.
Music. More specifically I try to make playlists that start with sad, angry, lonely, etc songs and end at either so so or happy songs.
Sleep. I wish I could follow this advice myself but finding your preferred sleep length and sticking to a schedule will help.
Anyways I hope this might be helpful to someone. Also, patrick no lead sandwiches, also I really want to come check out the Wartburg, the tri-five, and the chevelle someday.
Lexapro ain't it for me. It hit me like a taser and I've stopped after three days. CBD is my next experience to. Had a great 20 minute chat with a friend today and felt so much better afterward - I'm convinced socializing is critical.
You know, I'm not sure a day without anxiety would even feel like. It's been so long, if not always has been, forever.
In reply to OHSCrifle :
I miss socializing, it's definitely part of the problem. Let your doc know the meds aren't working, they work differently for different people. I couldn't take Zoloft, I had some really ugly mood swings.
Wally (Forum Supporter) said:In reply to OHSCrifle :
I miss socializing, it's definitely part of the problem. Let your doc know the meds aren't working, they work differently for different people. I couldn't take Zoloft, I had some really ugly mood swings.
This. It took 4 or 5 different tries to get the right script for me the first time. Since we're all a little different and the imbalances can be infinite basically it just takes time and a good dr,
Appleseed said:You know, I'm not sure a day without anxiety would even feel like. It's been so long, if not always has been, forever.
Amen.
In reply to Wally (Forum Supporter) :
Yeah i really miss my friends and family. It was really hard to not have anywhere to go Christmas afternoon. I have seen basically 5 grm'ers since march, and outside of them just a couple other people outside of my parents and inlaws here and there as we space out kids times with them. I've been to the grocery store probably 8 times, haven't touched a restaurant, no car stuff, no summit racing clearance shopping. I need to see people(that i like, berkeley everyone else) for my mental health. I went horribly dark in march and almost drove carli away because she was so scared of the place i was in and I wasn't in a place to do much other than go through the motions.
i'm going to go meditate and see what the day brings
Patrick (Forum Supporter) said:In reply to Wally (Forum Supporter) :
Yeah i really miss my friends and family. It was really hard to not have anywhere to go Christmas afternoon. I have seen basically 5 grm'ers since march, and outside of them just a couple other people outside of my parents and inlaws here and there as we space out kids times with them. I've been to the grocery store probably 8 times, haven't touched a restaurant, no car stuff, no summit racing clearance shopping. I need to see people(that i like, berkeley everyone else) for my mental health. I went horribly dark in march and almost drove carli away because she was so scared of the place i was in and I wasn't in a place to do much other than go through the motions.
i'm going to go meditate and see what the day brings
And I'm saying a prayer that your session of enlightenment will pull yu out da FUNK BRAH!!!!!
The worst part about everything is when i know i need to take some mental health time, take that time, and then beat myself up for a week because I didn't "get anything done" during that time and send myself farther down than i was before because of guilt because the addition isn't building itself, or the dishes don't wash themselves, or the laundry, or the cars don't magically run on their own
my therapist tried to teach me to forgive myself for doing what I neededto do for myself. That it's OK to stop doing for others to make sure you are taken care of. Sorta like the put your mask on before assisting others etc.
In reply to bobzilla :
I understand the concept, i just need to move past the guilt of self care. I know it's important, and that if I can't be there for me I can't be there for anyone else, but it's one of those deep down core things i need to figure out how to change inside. I don't have an off switch, i used to be proud of that. Now i realize how big a flaw it is and that it's caused me to not take care of any of my own needs basically since i was a little kid and didn't know any different. I was very serious in school from about 4th grade up. I did everything 110% and didn't let myself have fun. At 21 i broke away from corporate BS managing idiots and made myself successful and haven't worked a day since then for anyone but me. I'm a perfectionist and it's hard to accept that i have flaws.
In reply to Patrick (Forum Supporter) :
I get it. It's something I still struggkle with after 18 months of therapy.
Good to see everyone talking in this thread. I can throw out a bunch of the usual "hang in there" comments but they seem too easy to say. Some people don't talk about when they are hurting, just taught to hide it. Suck it up and keep working.
Keep talking, keep supporting. We are the GRM family.
Something unexpected: My dad gave me a hi-fi system and a turntable for Christmas/Birthday.
I initially looked at it as kind of a white elephant (long history with my dad), but I've since discovered it to be GREAT for my mental health and I sleep sooooo much better and less anxious now. I use listening to a record as a meditation in the evening.
Just... the ritual of selecting and putting on a record. Then sitting down and doing *nothing* but listening to a record. Maybe sipping some whisky while I do. Extra special bonus when the dog climbs up into my lap to cuddle.
I've tried doing guided mindfullness meditations. Listening to a record seems better. Guided meditation feels kinda like taking your medicine that I know I'm doing because it's good for me. Putting on a record feels like an indulgence. Then once it's on, it's like... it would be work to get up and turn it off before the end of a side. I can't be anxious and get up and jump around songs. The path of least resistance is to just let it happen and enjoy it. Which is also what I need to be doing for my mental health anyway.
Double bonus since music is such an emotional thing, so it can be a good opportunity to sort of tap into and exorcise the well of emotion and anxiety going on under the surface right now.
Patrick (Forum Supporter) said:In reply to bobzilla :
I understand the concept, i just need to move past the guilt of self care. I know it's important, and that if I can't be there for me I can't be there for anyone else, but it's one of those deep down core things i need to figure out how to change inside. I don't have an off switch, i used to be proud of that. Now i realize how big a flaw it is and that it's caused me to not take care of any of my own needs basically since i was a little kid and didn't know any different. I was very serious in school from about 4th grade up. I did everything 110% and didn't let myself have fun. At 21 i broke away from corporate BS managing idiots and made myself successful and haven't worked a day since then for anyone but me. I'm a perfectionist and it's hard to accept that i have flaws.
I found that sharing my guilt of self care with my wife was really helpful. Now that she knows that I struggle with that she actively encourages me to do things just for myself.
In reply to Beer Baron :
If you get past the modern mindfulness hijacking of meditation, you learn that satisfying activity that you get fully absorbed into and lose track of time IS meditation.
Enjoying your music makes you separate from your sense of "self". When you're listening, you're not thinking of "I", "me and "my", you're simply "being". Congratulations, your music is your meditation.
OHSCrifle said:Lexapro ain't it for me. It hit me like a taser and I've stopped after three days. CBD is my next experience to. Had a great 20 minute chat with a friend today and felt so much better afterward - I'm convinced socializing is critical.
Don't give up on meds after trying just one. I hate the idea of taking a pill everyday but I function so much better when I do and I can tell if I forget.
Socializing is critical. I'm an introvert so it can be hard for me to initiate and it takes emotional energy to have those interactions but I feel better overall when I do.
In reply to ShawnG :
Never thought of it that way. If that's true, I meditate all the time.
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