New job blues...

<rant>

I love the new place, but damn I can't afford to keep it up. Meaning a couple nights of hotel staying and go back home. Off season is only off season in a tourist mecca for sooo long. Kids still have 4 more months of schooling before they are out for summer and both will transition to new schools anyways, because of advancing grades. Too far to drive back home every day. SMWBO won't listen to me on securing a place to reside and how. Etc, etc, etc....

</rant>

TL:DR- love the job; hate everything else.

In reply to Ranger50 :

When I worked in SC and the fam stayed in MI, I rented a furnished room I found on the local CL.  I didn’t get murdered or raped AFAIK.

i flew home every other weekend.  It was a long year but nobody missed a meal.

AngryCorvair said:

In reply to Ranger50 :

When I worked in SC and the fam stayed in MI, I rented a furnished room I found on the local CL.  I didn’t get murdered or raped AFAIK.

i flew home every other weekend.  It was a long year but nobody missed a meal.

Roofies are a hell of a drug...

just to note, autocorrect tried to make this "ruffles are a hell of a drug" & I'm not sure which version is better...

In-laws are dealing with similar now. FIL relocated with a big raise when his plant closed. MIL is dragging her feet for any number of reasons. He flies back about once a month, thanks to $200 round trips. 

My dad did this trick for most of the time I can remember until he retired. He usually just found the cheapest apartment that didn't seem like a good way to get stabbed and live there until he got a weekend off to come home to see us. We survived. He did too. 

This lasted the better part of 12 years if I remember right in our case. Which I honestly don't recommend, but its definitely a reasonable solution short term in my opinion.

You need to talk to the Mrs. Not in the sofa, while she is on her laptop and focused on something else, but a real, proper, family economy-let's make a budget-we are financial partners, kind of talk. Write down the expenses created by this situation and sum them up by month and year. Then propose an alternative solution, if you have one.

    - I never stop to be amaze at couples where only one members has check of the financials (quite common). It is NOT just a right to be included, it is a shared responsibility and potentially a burden that one partner should have to take alone. (No offense, not saying that is the case here)

    - Ones the financial situation is made clear, propose your solution. If she doesn't like it, ask for her proposal. Be fair, she might need some time to think it over. Most likely, she will be much more motivated to talk about a solution when she see the yearly costs.

   - Don't argue. Don't make her feel dumb or silly, don't put her in a defensive mood. Just tell her that this is a problem and you (as in, you two together) need to solve it. Also: when laying it all out, remember that you have gone thru it earlier, while she is catching up right then and there, so your thought process is way ahead of hers.

   - Agree on when to talk again and make decisions.

Are you saying that the family will be relocating in 4 months when school is out?    If so, do like angrycorvair suggests, look for a furnished rom or small garage apartment.  Liking a job is a critical part of happiness.   

AirB&B or CL might help you to find a room mate situation.  I imagine that you only need a place Mon-night thru Thurs-night with you returning to the family for the weekend.

This probably makes you a "good room mate" given that you'll only be there half the week.  

I would wager that your financial outlay for a "room mate situation" will be less than what motels would cost.  This financial outlay will probably get you into a "better neighborhood".  You will also have the added benefit of not having to fully move out at the end of every week.  You'll have the ability to leave some work related clothes, toiletries and more until you return the next week.  

In reply to Ranger50 :

I live on the road, and honestly love it. There are lots of ways to improve and benefit from it (including your mental state).  Even the financials will likely look very good in the long term if you play it right (by the time you get through taxes, etc)

Not sure if you were looking for feedback, or just wanted to rant. 

Feel free to PM me if you’d like to chat. 

In reply to John Welsh :

I’ve done AirBnB. Tourist area owners typically don’t discount their rooms for longer stays, and don’t actually want long term guests. 

It seems counterintuitive. I thought they would discount those weekdays they can’t typically rent.  Generally, they like to be able to charge the higher prices for the weekends, and have the place quiet during the week. 

I'd second looking for an AirBNB for longer stays. I've had good experience with that when I was at the same client for months. You may save some money over a hotel (unless you stay in a Motel 6 or similar) but to me the big benefit was to be able to actually leave some of my stuff there so it actually was a second home. Made a big difference mindset wise.

Years ago I had an four day room mate, he came in Monday night, crashed like a rock. Come Friday morning he was loading up and was gone till next Monday. He was all to happy to pay the full asking price as he knew where he was sleeping and always brought more than enough booz, great eight months.

Paul B