Raising an autistic child is really challenging. I just want to be able to hug him, hear him say I love you, and not always worry about how others will react to how he reacts to the world.
The teen years are especially hard on autistic kids, and therefore, especially hard on the parents.
that is all. I just needed to say that and get it off my chest.
I'm with you. Mine is a senior in high school.
Sorry man. Mine is just 6, and it's tough already.
My oldest is 38. She wouldn't speak to my new wife for 2 years and years later she's still angry with her.
A month ago they decided to move to Florida on a spur of the moment Job offer for him. ( she had to give up her career with the airlines ). Sold their house. And Left giving me 2 week notice.
Children aren't easier when they grow up.
As an autistic dad of two autistic boys, I hear you. All of us are Asperger's, my wife is very gracious.
It will work out. But your job right now is to be their dad, and try to give them tools to help cope with being autistic in an ADHD world.
They may also find good connections in high school - I have always connected really well with other autistic kids. I share with my class at the start that I am autistic; it give hope to the kids who also are, and hopefully opens the eyes of the other kids that autism isn't nasty, it just has a different way of looking at things.
I usually also tell them that as such, I may not always get their jokes.
Of course, it may depend on how far down the spectrum your child is. Regardless, it's going to be a very different take on things than you have. It may not be what you envisioned, but it is what it is; roll with it as best you can.
My mom has worked with kids with severe Autism. Most never talked. But they knew. Knew who treated them well. Respected them. Loved them.
They might not say it. Might not be able to speak it. But they know. Your kid loves you in ways you can't imagine.
I don't have any experience but we're here for you if you need anything.
Thanks for all the support. I appreciate it. The venting is helpfull.
In reply to SkinnyG (Forum Supporter) :
Thanks for sharing your experience. It's helpful.
I'm sure you've heard this -- but as a teacher we have a saying: "if you've taught one student with autism, you've taught one student with autism".
I love teaching and working with students with autism. The growth and successes that happen over time are so incredible to see. I have so many incredible success stories of former students, doing all kinds of rewarding and engaging things. Parents are the key part of it . . . be strong, be an advocate, and be a light. Even when it is exhausting.
You aren't alone here. Our oldest boy (12) is on the spectrum. When he was little I'd have freelance parenting experts tell me I just needed to spank him more. I damn near punched one person for saying that during a tough day. The meds help keep the impulse actions at bay, but it doesn't change the wiring inside. I've spent a fortune on specialized OT and it helped a lot. Hang in there man.
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