What's the slickest way to carry around a wad of banknotes?

Here's the story. I have to pay someone 14 000 000 Rupiah in cash tomorrow, for a transaction that is completely legal and certainly not sketchy or anything like that. (Okay, fine, I'm really just hiring a boat.) The most convenient bank machine only dispenses Rp. 50 000 notes, so that's what I have, 280 of them to be precise. This is sadly not enough to fill a classic black briefcase, nor do I have the requisite charcoal grey suit, moustache and aviators to pull that look off.

So, I put this question to you: how best should I carry this wad o' livelyhood as I stroll through town acting like I own the place? The classier-yet-shadier the better.

Discuss.

I would use Catcher in the Rye.

Note: Replace actual Rye depicted with wad 'o cash.

Money belt.....or hire a car to take you directly from A to B.

Classy yet shady? Violin case.

My boss once bought a house for $28,000 cash, back in the '70s. He put the money in a cereal box. His thought process was that no one is going to mug a guy walking down the street with nothing but a cereal box.

Enveloppe, crappy half torn up enveloppe.

OR, rolled up in a disposable coffee cup. Then you pretend to be just holding a coffee and thieves are none the wiser. Works best with lid.

Big duffel bag like you just robbed a bank. Not classy at all, but totally shady. Then treat the transaction as such, just to confuse the guy. Like, throw the bag at his feet from a few meters away and just stand back.

You are going to need a Fedora and a top coat. Also... even if you don't smoke... too bad. Get some.

Clench the smoke in your teeth. Put your right hand in your pocket as if fingering a "heater" and produce this from your lapel with the other hand:

When talking to the seller... over-annunciate the word BOAT while looking around. Like:

"See here, I need the (pause) BOAT (pause, look over shoulder...) tomorrow at seven sharp."

EDIT: Also.. very important. Speak out of the corner of your mouth while clenching the cigarette in your teeth.

How much is that? Like, six bucks? Oh wait, I forgot about inflation. 6 million bucks?

Anyway, on the ships, large sums of cash money for payoffs (the unions mandate payoffs in cash so that they can "collect" union dues in cash. Less "paperwork" that way, don't you know...), like 50 to 100 large would be delivered typically in 1 of 2 ways: By a guy that just walks onboard with a paper bag and hands it to the captain, or by armored truck, guns out, etc.

I like the coffee cup idea.. I will have to use that sometime. I would make like you are occasionally drinking out of it too

I used to do nightly bank drops, usual canvas bag with a zipper. I put it in a 7-11 paper bag. Coffee cup sounds like a good idea if you don't pick up the srong one along the way.

I had a maybe $200 dollar hotel bill in Tashkent. I exchanged currency at our embassy and got a shopping bag full of cash. I just kept it in the bag until I got to the hotel. Too bad the hotel did not accept their local currency.

I have an empty violin case for sale, just in case one of you might need it for future transactions.

In your pants. Then when you go to pay the guy reach in like your trying to calm a bad STD and pull out his cash instead.

slick oilslick oil

Man, that rate of exchange is wild. According to the Interwebz, that equals 1567.93 in real money.

Ask Richard Gere, I've heard he has some good ideas of where to put things....

While my case was 3 grand in $20s, so only 150, but the correct answer is spread out and posted on Facebook, like a baller.

Fanny pack?

In a sock stuffed into the front of your pants.

former520 wrote: In a sock stuffed into the front of your pants.

Front?

Hmm, guess I did it wrong. Probably explains all those weird looks.

"No, no, no!!...zee potato goes in zee FRONT"

in a black plastic bag held in one hand with a dog leash attached to a gnarly looking dog in the other...who in thier right mind is going to mess with somebody holding a mongrel dog and something that resembles a bag full of poop? not i said the blind man