Good news and bad news:
- Good news, the problem is gone. The check engine light has disappeared entirely. There are no current codes. No misfire, no EGR, no catalytic converter.
- Bad news, I essentially didn't do anything to fix it. All the coils are the same. All the sparkplugs are the same. Also, uh, there's a new problem.
I started out by pulling the number 5 and 8 coil, and visually inspecting them. 8 looked a little worse, had some moisture on it, but nothing terrible. I pulled the 5 and 8 plugs as well, and they looked the same. I have pictures, and I'll upload them later. I put the plugs back in their original cylinders, and swapped coil 5 to cylinder 8, and coil 8 to cylinder 5.
Took it on a test drive, and nothing changed. I got a misfire in less than a minute, and during my first attempt at causing a misfire by accelerating aggressively, the orange AND red warning light came on, along with messages for traction control AND stability control failure. That all went away after a second or two, so I kept driving. The misfire continued to occastionally occur, as did the other weird stuff, which also included all the gauges dropping to zero/cold/empty like the car shut off. I pulled onto a side street and checked the codes, and lo and behold, ALL THE SAME MISFIRE/CATALYTIC CONVERTER CODES.
Oh, also, before that test drive, I apparently bumped the coolant level sensor loose, so when I started the car, it was VERY ANGRY and wanted to make sure I was aware the coolant was low. Thankfully it wasn't actually low, and I was able to get the sensor back in. I have no idea how it's actually attached, but it's in there.
So I drove home, pulled the coils again, and then swapped the plugs from 5 to 8 and 8 to 5. There was some moisture on the boot I pulled out of cylinder 8... So at this point, coil 8 and plug 8 were both in cylinder 5, and coil 5 and plug 5 were both in cylinder 8. The only other thing I did was run a shop towel down the number 8 sparkplug hole, in case that moisture I saw was part of the problem. Time for another test drive.
At first, it was uneventful. I drove longer than the first entire test drive without even one misfire. But then the weirdness came back. Gauges all dropped, red and orange warning lights came on, and the traction and stability control warnings came up, along with the BRAKE warning light. Car was still running without any issue, and it went back to normal a second later. I think it also said something about "Failsafe Mode", but the messages went by so fast that I can't say for sure. This continued to happen intermittently for the whole 10 minute drive. It never lasted more than a second or so, and the time between events was anywhere from a few seconds to several minutes. It did have an effect on performance, but not a significant one, at least not the times that it happened, which were mostly when maintaining speed, and twice idling in the driveway when I got home.
There is a code, but it's just pending. P1797. I looked it up and it seems to be a communication issue between the ECM and TCM, possibly. Someone with an S-Type was able to fix it by simply cleaning the connection for the wires going to the rear of the transmission, but since my gauges are acting funny, I'm thinking that code is more of a symptom of a larger issue. It must be electrical though, I would imagine. I'll have to look into it more when I have time tomorrow, but for now, the car is at least more driveable than it was, although I don't plan on going on any long trips, in case the weird electrical thing starts happening more often, and leaves me in a non-intermittent failsafe mode.
As far as the misfire, the only thing I can think is that the moisture I cleaned out was causing an issue for the cylinder 8 coil/plug. The coil cover on that side isn't in the best shape, and is letting water seep in that probably shouldn't be in there. Two of the threaded inserts for the bolts were torn out of the valve cover, one of the bolt holes was broken off, and another broke off while I was removing one of the bolts from the threaded insert that pulled out of the valve cover. There was moisture all along the rear half of the cover.
The plan will be to epoxy those inserts back in, possibly buy a new coil cover, and then use some RTV to seal it better at the rear to prevent water ingress. I'll probably do that tomorrow if it's not raining (if I decide to just keep using the damaged cover).
Pictures are added! Cylinder 5 plug and coil is on the left, cylinder 8 is on the right. Also this post is probably kind of a mess, and really long, but that's probably going to happen a lot, it's just what my brain does.