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Toyman01
Toyman01 PowerDork
5/2/13 7:10 p.m.

83 RX-7. Currently blown up.

89 Thunderbird Super Coupe

94 F350 crew cab dually

1980 Spitfire that was apparently raped by Mazda.

Not sure I know where to start with this one, but I'll give it a try.

Really, really old, tweed jacket wearing, handle bar mustache sporting, crazy, crappy mechanic with a tiny penis.

Spoolpigeon
Spoolpigeon Dork
5/2/13 7:32 p.m.

2006 Malibu - grandpa

2006 Malibu Maxx - grandma

S2000 - marginally less gay than a Miata owner

Hal
Hal Dork
5/2/13 8:52 p.m.

No idea how I would be stereotyped:

Toy - 2001 Ford Focus with a supercharger and beefed up suspension.

DD - 2010 Transit Connect XLT (the wagon one not a cargo van)

When the wife lets me have it - 2013 Subaru Legacy sedan

bmw88rider
bmw88rider Reader
5/2/13 9:21 p.m.

Oh man...I didn't even think about it till now. My neighbors must thinking I'm hiding some lesbians in the house! I have a C30 and Forester parked out front. The gayest of the gay cars and the butch lesbian ride of choice.

So...when you add in a Miata and MR2 in the garage...where does it put me?

Rufledt
Rufledt Dork
5/2/13 10:26 p.m.
CGLockRacer wrote: In reply to DaveEstey: RX-8: Gambler

Does that mean reliable RX-8= gambler on a lucky streak? Or perhaps just a future mechanic?

AverageH
AverageH New Reader
5/2/13 10:36 p.m.

'97 thupercharged Miata

'79 Triumph Thpitfire

'08 Jeep Patriot

So with the two tiny roadsters, does that make me hyper-gay? I don't know what the Patriot makes me; seeing as it's a small SUV, maybe a small penis wannabe....

-Hamid

93EXCivic
93EXCivic MegaDork
5/3/13 7:15 a.m.
AverageH wrote: '97 thupercharged Miata '79 Triumph Thpitfire '08 Jeep Patriot So with the two tiny roadsters, does that make me hyper-gay? I don't know what the Patriot makes me; seeing as it's a small SUV, maybe a small penis wannabe.... -Hamid

No the Miata is the one that stereotypes you as gay. The Triumph makes you either old or not quite right in the head.

mad_machine
mad_machine MegaDork
5/3/13 8:07 a.m.
Tim Baxter wrote: Not long ago I had a Miata and a Subaru wagon. Nobody knew if I was a gay man or gay woman.

Should we rename you Pat?

Adrian_Thompson
Adrian_Thompson UltraDork
5/3/13 9:43 a.m.
bmw88rider wrote: Oh man...I didn't even think about it till now. My neighbors must thinking I'm hiding some lesbians in the house! I have a C30 and Forester parked out front. The gayest of the gay cars and the butch lesbian ride of choice. So...when you add in a Miata and MR2 in the garage...where does it put me?

I don't know there was a fellow C30 owner on here. Maybe we could, you know, get together some time

AverageH
AverageH New Reader
5/3/13 9:54 a.m.
93EXCivic wrote:
AverageH wrote: '97 thupercharged Miata '79 Triumph Thpitfire '08 Jeep Patriot So with the two tiny roadsters, does that make me hyper-gay? I don't know what the Patriot makes me; seeing as it's a small SUV, maybe a small penis wannabe.... -Hamid
No the Miata is the one that stereotypes you as gay. The Triumph makes you either old or not quite right in the head.

You know, I heard somewhere that back in the day the Spitfire was considered a hairdresser's car. Is that true? I was too young and gay to be aware of it.

-Hamid

Curmudgeon
Curmudgeon MegaDork
5/3/13 9:54 a.m.

Isuzu Trooper = cheap barstid. Practicality is king, cares not a whit what those driving the snootymobiles think. Prefers blue jeans to khakis, wears a suit only if there's a gun held to his head. Yup, fits me perfectly.

Restored Jensen Healy = recapturing misspent youth and prefers obscure stuff to 'running with the pack'. Again right on the money.

XS650 street tracker/café morph = same as restored J-H.

Rotary powered Jensen Healey with a roll cage = this guy has black fingernails, too much time on his hands and definitely has some serious screws loose. Again, right on the money. Well, he does scrub his fingernails as clean as possible.

Tom Suddard
Tom Suddard Intern
5/3/13 10:01 a.m.
Curmudgeon wrote: Isuzu Trooper = cheap barstid. Practicality is king, cares not a whit what those driving the snootymobiles think. Prefers blue jeans to khakis, wears a suit only if there's a gun held to his head. Yup, fits me perfectly.

I wore a suit in my Trooper all the time! Heck I used to have to be careful not to touch the outside of it because then there would be mud all over my suit!

Now I'm in college and never wear one. Life is good.

Conquest351
Conquest351 SuperDork
5/3/13 10:04 a.m.

6 cyl automatic Mustang = high likelyhood of hot chick driving.

6 cyl automatic camaro = high likelyhood of some douchebag driving it.

Butterfly sticker on Mustang will increase likelyhood of hotness, beware, this can backfire greatly and the car will be occupied by an overweight 40-something year old divorcee.

Back in the early 2000's the Mustang stereotype also worked for Camaros and Firebirds. Butterfly sticker theory held true on all accounts.

Curmudgeon
Curmudgeon MegaDork
5/3/13 10:06 a.m.
Tom Suddard wrote:
Curmudgeon wrote: Isuzu Trooper = cheap barstid. Practicality is king, cares not a whit what those driving the snootymobiles think. Prefers blue jeans to khakis, wears a suit only if there's a gun held to his head. Yup, fits me perfectly.
I wore a suit in my Trooper all the time! Heck I used to have to be careful not to touch the outside of it because then there would be mud all over my suit! Now I'm in college and never wear one. Life is good.

See? Suit and Trooper do not go together, young padwan.

z31maniac
z31maniac PowerDork
5/3/13 10:09 a.m.
bmw88rider wrote: Oh man...I didn't even think about it till now. My neighbors must thinking I'm hiding some lesbians in the house! I have a C30 and Forester parked out front. The gayest of the gay cars and the butch lesbian ride of choice. So...when you add in a Miata and MR2 in the garage...where does it put me?

Interesting.

One my friends rides a Harley and drives an old Ranger pickup truck HE is a hair dresser.

His wife drives a C30.

Joe Gearin
Joe Gearin Associate Publisher
5/3/13 10:14 a.m.

Oh boy.....no wonder my neighbors look at me funny.....

Turbo Miata--- Gay man into hardcore S&M

E36 M3--- porcupine yuppie

TR-6--- stodgy old troglodyte ( hits a little close to home there....)

76 VW Scirocco----- stancetard, flatbrimmer (although the car isn't "stanced")

82 Ford Pickup---- Scrapper, or meth-head tree trimmer

84 Ford Van / Camper-----pedophile, rapist, Matt Foley (living down by the river type)

84 AMC Eagle---- International playboy / movie star

Conquest351
Conquest351 SuperDork
5/3/13 10:15 a.m.

Here's how it worked when I worked at Motion Dynamics...

SVO owner - - Generally cool - Have money, not scared to spend it - Want 100% total resto OR want to go as fast as possible - Will pay top dollar for NOS parts

Merkur owner - - Generally a complete jerk - No money, super cheap - You should feel honored to touch such a nice piece of precision German engineering

TurboCoupe owner - - Generally stoned - VERY cool people - Want to go as fast as humanly possible - NO money, want to do it all on the cheap/free

I have been surprised by these customers, but as a general rule, once they told you their car, you knew what you could expect from them.

ReverendDexter
ReverendDexter UberDork
5/3/13 10:16 a.m.

MR2 Spyder: Couldn't afford a Boxter Possibly mid-life crisis, likely divorced.

Beat up Foxbody Mustang: Dude... um... you got any meth I can buy?

ransom
ransom UltraDork
5/3/13 10:44 a.m.
AverageH wrote: You know, I heard somewhere that back in the day the Spitfire was considered a hairdresser's car. Is that true? I was too young and gay to be aware of it. -Hamid

That was my first out-loud laugh of the day...

JoeyM
JoeyM MegaDork
5/3/13 11:35 a.m.
Joe Gearin wrote: 84 AMC Eagle---- International playboy / movie star

NGTD
NGTD Dork
5/3/13 11:39 a.m.
RealMiniDriver wrote: II am not the skinny, flat brim, DC shoes 19yo my Subaru WRX would lead you to believe I am. I'm a fat 45yo, that wears bandanas to avoid sunburn on my balding head. Boots are my preferred footwear.

Were almost twins except I am 46.

My WRX also has a full SS Turbo back exhaust with a low restriction muffler which even further makes the 19 yo expectation.

Matt B
Matt B Dork
5/3/13 12:09 p.m.

06 Mazda5 - In my particular neighborhood, it's highly likely I'm a lesbian. Male version would likely be mild-mannered, middle-aged guy with kids.

99 Integra - stock looking other than mildly lowered and has the factory bodykit. So....yeah, any Honda plus lowering = RICER WILL RUN YOUR KIDS DOWN.

86 MR2 - not sure about this one, but the black wheels lean it into the RICER territory once again. That said, it's always really young kids and considerably aged men who comment on it. Dunno.

In reality, I'm just an artsy-fartsy graphic designer greasemonkey-wannabe who's approaching middle age. If I had kids, I guess I'd fit the Maz5 pretty well.

pilotbraden
pilotbraden SuperDork
5/3/13 12:22 p.m.

With 4 cars, 2 trucks and 4 motorcycles at my house, the neighbors have sterotyped me as crazy.

yamaha
yamaha UltraDork
5/3/13 12:34 p.m.

Where do I rank on this?

91 SHO

95 SHO

95 318ti

77 320i

01 focus

63 IH c1500

This ought to be good.

wvumtnbkr
wvumtnbkr HalfDork
5/3/13 12:41 p.m.

Yamaha....

You are a heterosexual shiny happy person....

However, I have no idea what your cars say about you.

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