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GameboyRMH
GameboyRMH SuperDork
10/21/09 8:46 a.m.

The 2012 post inspired be to write this while we're on the topic of conspiracy theorists. I like to entertain myself reading opinions from crazy conspiracy theorists, and 9/11 truthers are the worst by a long shot. Why? They are the only conspiracy theorists who make their conspiracy far more ridiculous than necessary.

Conspiracy theories usually involve an improbable, but possible motive and a totally impossible, or at least batE36 M3 crazy explanation to back it up. Let's take moon landing deniers for example:

Improbable motive: The US wanted to stick it to Russia in the space race by landing on the moon, but had trouble with space radiation. They thought nobody would notice if they just faked it, so they did.

Impossible / f'in crazy method: It was staged in a warehouse in the New Mexico desert, please ignore photos, stuff left on the moon, etc, etc, etc.

Here the theory is not more complicated than it needs to be. The explanation has more holes in it than an industrial cheese grater, but it's simple. Now let's look at 9/11 truthers.

Improbable motive: Bush/Illuminati wanted to pull off the 9/11 attacks to funnel money into their pockets/take over the world.

Impossible / f'in crazy method: Planes with remote controls stuck to them / explosives that were built into the building decades ago during construction / all kinds of crazy and wrong E36 M3 about steel melting temperatures.

Now here you have a theory that is way wackier than it needs to be. This is akin to moon landing deniers saying the US sent advanced, lifelike androids in space suits onto the moon using teleportation, but man never walked on the moon!!!1one

Now if you are a powerful politician or THE ILLUMINATI, you could just dress a dude up as a middle eastern religious nutjob whose very existence is poorly documented and send him to fly a plane into a building, or threaten a real middle eastern religious nutjob by holding his family hostage into doing the same. There are a million less wacky explanations, but the 9/11 truthers keep going for the wackiest ones over and over again like a fly into a glass window. And that is why they are the worst.

foxtrapper
foxtrapper SuperDork
10/21/09 9:03 a.m.

Mmm. Ever talked to the LaRouche's? The anti-fluouride people? The flat earthers?

9/11 conspiracy nuts are no further out there than most.

And btw, photographs are easily faked, and photographs are the only "proof" you've got of stuff being left on the moon by Americans. Not that I disbelieve we went there, but claiming "proof" of it because we left stuff there is a weak and circular proof.

Kendall_Jones
Kendall_Jones Reader
10/21/09 9:11 a.m.
foxtrapper wrote: And btw, photographs are easily faked, and photographs are the only "proof" you've got of stuff being left on the moon by Americans. Not that I disbelieve we went there, but claiming "proof" of it because we left stuff there is a weak and circular proof.

I thought there was a reflector or something on the moon? Shoot a laser at it & it bounces back.

KJ

GameboyRMH
GameboyRMH SuperDork
10/21/09 9:12 a.m.
Kendall_Jones wrote:
foxtrapper wrote: And btw, photographs are easily faked, and photographs are the only "proof" you've got of stuff being left on the moon by Americans. Not that I disbelieve we went there, but claiming "proof" of it because we left stuff there is a weak and circular proof.
I thought there was a reflector or something on the moon? Shoot a laser at it & it bounces back. KJ

Yep, reflectors, moon buggies, lander bases, lots of stuff. And while the photos are weak evidence, the moon rocks and source of the radio signals during the moon landing are not.

John Brown
John Brown SuperDork
10/21/09 9:14 a.m.

That is the reflection of the cheese.

The reason that there was no real big plume of dust when they smashed the Toyota Camry into that moon crater last week is because the moon doesn't exist, it is just what the matrix wants us to see.

captainzib
captainzib Reader
10/21/09 9:19 a.m.

Is toyota camry a new substitution for our language filter?

TJ
TJ HalfDork
10/21/09 9:19 a.m.

I too enjoy a good conspiracry theory. I agree that the truthers explanation is a little too complex and would've taken too many people to pull off that it would not stay a secret for too long.

My favorite one is still HAARP. It can control the weather and cause earthquakes and anything else "they" want it to do. Seems like it worries the Chinese some and that makes it even funnier. Like all good conspiracy theories it is based on something real.

Chemtrails to me is the most absurd one, but that might be because of all the mind control chemicals "they" dropped on me from high in the atmosphere. That's what "they" want me to think.

Xceler8x
Xceler8x Dork
10/21/09 9:58 a.m.

Birthers

/thread.

Tetzuoe
Tetzuoe Reader
10/21/09 10:05 a.m.
TJ wrote: Chemtrails to me is the most absurd one, but that might be because of all the mind control chemicals "they" dropped on me from high in the atmosphere. That's what "they" want me to think.

oh nono thats contrails, its the clouds airplanes leave behind, I used to have a LONG dvd explaining the whole conspiracy, man it was some brilliant drivel. I gave it to my boss at the time who shared a love for the insane stupidity of conspiracy theorists. He was blown away at the fact that the entire dvd was full.

aircooled
aircooled SuperDork
10/21/09 10:16 a.m.

Yah, I love the chemtrails one. What?, you have no concept of condensation?

The conspiracy thing amazes me also. One of the really interesting things about the people is that some (many?) would be considered rather intelligent otherwise.

I think it has something to do with the natural tendency of a person (especially more intellectual ones) to look for answers to things. This of course is a good thing and has lead to many many good things. But it seems to go all wrong in some people and they seem to look for explanations where they really aren't necessary or they already exist. Then again I suspect some just like a "good story" and the real explanation is not that "good".

So I suspect there is also a soap opera / fantasy role playing aspect to it all. People trying to make their lives more interesting or exciting by throwing themselves into a bit of a fantasy world that they can explore and maybe even become experts or important people in.

fiat22turbo
fiat22turbo SuperDork
10/21/09 10:30 a.m.
Xceler8x wrote: Birthers /thread.

Isn't there someone on this board who buys into this already?

Kendall_Jones
Kendall_Jones Reader
10/21/09 10:35 a.m.
captainzib wrote: Is toyota camry a new substitution for our language filter?

Apparently toyota camry = Scheiße

:)

Kendall

Autolex
Autolex HalfDork
10/21/09 10:42 a.m.

E36 M3 = E36 M3e.

iceracer
iceracer HalfDork
10/21/09 10:56 a.m.

Even had a lady wrote a letter to the editor of my local paper about the "Contrail Conspiracy". I tried to explain that it was just water vapor, but she would have no part of it since so & so said it and it was true.

John Brown
John Brown SuperDork
10/21/09 11:47 a.m.
captainzib wrote: Is toyota camry a new substitution for our language filter?

The LCROSS module was about the size of a Camry. It should be a filter word regardless.

Duke
Duke SuperDork
10/21/09 11:55 a.m.

Does Bob Costas drive a Camry?

Man, I've had some serious internet gos with 911 truthers. It is amazing what vast quantities of assumption they will hang their hats on.

Jay
Jay Dork
10/21/09 12:42 p.m.
GameboyRMH wrote: 9/11 truthers are the dumbest conspiracy theorists

Sadly no, they aren't even close.

Kia_racer
Kia_racer New Reader
10/21/09 12:54 p.m.

OMG that was sooooooo funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

joey48442
joey48442 SuperDork
10/21/09 12:59 p.m.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTv9dM4t_iY&feature=fvw

Wacky!

Although I do think my IPhone has made me the stupidest guy in the room, as I dont have to know anything, I have it all on the Iphone!

Joey

GameboyRMH
GameboyRMH SuperDork
10/21/09 1:00 p.m.

Yeah I've seen crazy sprinkler lady, but that's just crazy rambling. It's only a conspiracy theory when crazy people are rambling it in a group.

Strizzo
Strizzo SuperDork
10/21/09 1:18 p.m.
joey48442 wrote: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTv9dM4t_iY&feature=fvw Wacky! Although I do think my IPhone has made me the stupidest guy in the room, as I dont have to know anything, I have it all on the Iphone! Joey

hah, definitely. is there a lmgtfy app yet?

oldsaw
oldsaw HalfDork
10/21/09 1:20 p.m.
GameboyRMH wrote: It's only a conspiracy theory when crazy people are rambling it in a group.

"Birthers" have already been (deservedly) denounced, so here is a different group-rambling:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WofiT3G1CR8

One turn deserves another.

poopshovel
poopshovel SuperDork
10/21/09 1:31 p.m.

Dynamically scored based on silliness, how annoying/eager to 'spread the word' the 'believers' are, how frighteningly fervently convinced said believers are:

1) Armageddon (Mayan calendar, Nostradamus, Revelations, Jamestown, etc., etc., etc.) Any time you mix a little religion/philosophy in with your conspiracy, you're begging for bat-E36 M3 crazy.

2) 9/11: Sadly, the "older" generation who was once revered as very wise and hard-working, has discovered the internets. Suddenly, your uncle who works at Wal-mart is a berkeleying expert on thermodynamics.

3) Moon landing: At least this one's entertaining to think about, and oh sweet baby jesus, I would've loved to have been there when old-ass Buzz Aldrin jacked this berkeleyer up:

ttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaUqaVj51w4

4) Birthers: Low on the scale of pure whackiness. Off the charts on the scale of annoyingness/head shaking disappointment.

5) The con-trail thing: I'd never heard that one. Again, annoying on the "I work as a janitor, but I'm smarter than an aerospace engineer" front, but not as prevalent as the others.

Snowdoggie
Snowdoggie HalfDork
10/21/09 2:02 p.m.
Xceler8x wrote: Birthers /thread.

I would like to start a new birther movement, only instead of Kenya, he would be dropped from a flying saucer in order to take over the government before the big invasion. Of course since he wasn't actually born on this planet......

....hey, is Art Bell still on the air?

GameboyRMH
GameboyRMH SuperDork
10/21/09 2:34 p.m.
oldsaw wrote:
GameboyRMH wrote: It's only a conspiracy theory when crazy people are rambling it in a group.
"Birthers" have already been (deservedly) denounced, so here is a different group-rambling: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WofiT3G1CR8 One turn deserves another.

What's the conspiracy theory? That a bunch of people chanting in a subway station determined the outcome of the elections?

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