Dear CL car sellers

I've got one! Saw this two years ago, and almost had to call the cops it was so funny.

1989 Chevy Camaro IROC z28 (So he claimed). No Badging at all, painted white. Seller claimed to have lost keys, so he punched out the door locks and the column, installing a switch instead. Claimed Daily Driver. Claimed to have "hot rodded", but couldn't name even a cam upgrade. Pictures were taken in a storage lot, in front of a large-sized locker. Claimed he had the title.

Basically, it really said "I've been stolen and now you can own me!"

What really drives me nuts are the ads that read like text messages or tweets. I replied to one, "please translate."

"I HAVE A 1986 FORD MUSTANG WITH THE SVO MOTOR THIS IS THE YEAR RIGHT BEFORE THEY CAME OUT WITH THE 5.0......THE CAR IS IN NEED OF SOME WORK IT NEEDS A NEW MUFFLER ALL THE WAY BACK (PUTTING DUAL PIPES ON WOULD BE MY RECOMMENDATION).......THIS CAR IS EXTREMELY RARE BECAUSE IT HAS THE V6 INSTEAD OF THE 4 CYLINDER AND HAS ONLY 60,000 ORIGINAL MILES.....THE CAR WILL START PUT IS SMOKING PRETTY BAD THOUGHT IT WAS A CRACKED HEAD BUT THEYRE STEEL SO DOUBT IT...CAR DOES HAVE A LITTLE DAMAGE TO FRONT RIGHT QUARTER PANEL THE DINT COULD EASILY BE PULLED CAR IS IN PERFECT COSMETIC DAMAGE OTHER THAN THAT PAINT IS GOOD AS WELL AS NO RUST. CAR IS EXTREMELY RARE UNDER 10,000 WERE SOLD. WILL HAVE PICS SOON IF INTERESTED PLEASE EMAIL I CHECK IT FREQUENTLY. THIS CAR HAS TONS OF POWER. "

I would like to go see this rare beast...

I like the fluctuating price - there has been a Mazdaspeed MX-5 for sale on San Diego Craigslist for a couple of weeks for prices ranging between $10,000 and $11,500. Yesterday it was $10,000, today it is back up to $11,000. It is also on Autotrader for $9500. Craigslist says the reason for sale is because the sellers son got a ticket, Autotrader lists divorce.

There is a miata on the local boards. Its from a dealer. It says in the posting that its in one town, but its in a town 45 minutes away. There is a new posting every other day. It pisses me off so much.

Here in FL, A/C is a must. I constantly see:

A/C works great, just needs new compressor.

A/C works, needs recharge.

monark192 wrote: I like the fluctuating price - there has been a Mazdaspeed MX-5 for sale on San Diego Craigslist for a couple of weeks for prices ranging between $10,000 and $11,500. Yesterday it was $10,000, today it is back up to $11,000. It is also on Autotrader for $9500. Craigslist says the reason for sale is because the sellers son got a ticket, Autotrader lists divorce.

listing a slightly different price get's around the CL filters that prevent people from spamming.

I get a kick out of all the misspellings. You have no no idea how many times I have responded to an ad to buy a "wench" and was dissapointed that they only had a winch for sale.

I'm still looking for vintage Camero badges. Can't find them.

Jay wrote: "Needs washed". "Needs tuned." "Needs painted." Is it really that hard to type to be? I mean I just did it... Sheesh.

Well...that's the way we talk around here. At least I do, and I'm fairly edumacated and articyooluht.

Seriously..."it needs washed" is what I'd say if I was looking at a dirty car.

Clem

Clay wrote: Here in FL, A/C is a must. I constantly see: A/C works great, just needs new compressor. A/C works, needs recharge.

This one drives me nuts too. The a/c does NOT work if it doesn't blow cold air, period. Movement of air indicates only a working fan motor...and that's about it.

Clem

And I'm always a fan of a seller telling me how good a value a car is (not really. it torques me off pretty good)...especially when they're asking going-rate prices or higher.

Sure, I agree "it's worth it for the parts," but if it's only worth it for the parts, good luck getting a salvage yard to give you anything above scrap value for it...

Clem

Clemsparks said: Well...that's the way we talk around here. At least I do, and I'm fairly edumacated and articyooluht. Seriously..."it needs washed" is what I'd say if I was looking at a dirty car. Clem

Yeah, it's a regional dialect thing. My wife says the same thing. I think she picked it up growing up in Indiana, but she hasn't lived there for 20 years. She also calls the vacuum a "sweeper."

I got very lucky when selling a 510 project on CL. The first guy to email me said "I'm very interested, here's my phone #, I'd like to come look at the car tomorrow", and offered full asking price when he showed up.

Meanwhile, about 6 other parties emailed me asking "These cars are pretty easy to work on, right?" and "Wat engines can you fit in this car, cuz these seem like they would be fun with more power, LOL."

I also explained in the ad that the car was not in running condition, but nearly everyone asked "But I can get it to run and drive it home with a few hours of work, right?" IF THE CAR COULD BE MADE OPERATIONAL WITH A FEW HOURS OF WORK, DON'T YOU THINK I WOULD DO SO AND SELL IT FOR 30-40% MORE!?!?

ClemSparks wrote:

Jay wrote: "Needs washed". "Needs tuned." "Needs painted." Is it really that hard to type to be? I mean I just did it... Sheesh.

Well...that's the way we talk around here. At least I do, and I'm fairly edumacated and articyooluht. Seriously..."it needs washed" is what I'd say if I was looking at a dirty car. Clem

Then stop saying that! Gah!! It's wrong!!

People speak like that here too, it bugs me to tears. People also say "might could" or "maybe could", as in "We might could wash that for ya if it didn't need fixed" and then I punch them.

My biggest beef with CL car ads is that 98% of them don't list what kind of transmission is in the car!

My assumption is no mention == automatic, but if it's something interesting enough I always email them a "Is it stick or auto?" email. Interestingly enough, I've found that if I ask even ONE more question than that, sellers will ALWAYS ignore the transmission question, and I have to send a second email.

Oh, and who has access enough to list a car on CL, but doesn't have an email address? No, I don't want to talk to you on the phone, and I don't want you to have my phone number. Just list a damn email already, so we can each communicate at our convenience.

... and another couple of good ones:

• "Nice custom paint job last year". That very much depends on the eye of the beer holder and I don't drink your brand. Not after I've seen the paint job.
• "Runs really good, just leaks about a quart of trans fluid per week"
• "It has the 460 motor installed and almost running (needs fuel pressure regulator that I have it ready to install)". So how long does it take to install the FPR? And why should I believe you that's all that's wrong with the motor?

I've also been trying to figure out who "NED SMOG" is, he seems to be making lots of appearances in car ads these days.

"But can I get it to run with a few hours work..."

Actually, is this really a dumb question? I mean (kick in sarcasm, now) don't you often see CL ads that say "needs a battery" or "needs a water pump" or "needs a ......., priced it at AutoZone and it's only $40"?

Cuz when I see that in an ad, I have to ask myself, "why aren't you able to get to the auto parts store for that $40 part...if it will get that otherwise non-running vehicle out of your driveway?"

How about the ads with the list of "keywords" longer than the actual ad? Why would Hondata be a good keyword in an ad for a Roadmaster?

ReverendDexter wrote: My biggest beef with CL car ads is that 98% of them don't list what kind of transmission is in the car! My assumption is no mention == automatic, but if it's something interesting enough I always email them a "Is it stick or auto?" email. Interestingly enough, I've found that if I ask even ONE more question than that, sellers will ALWAYS ignore the transmission question, and I have to send a second email.

I hate this too! Most of the time I want the manual trans, but if I ask more than three questions it gets ignored. Usually takes a few tries to find out the mileage too.

tuna55 wrote:

ClemSparks wrote:

Jay wrote: "Needs washed". "Needs tuned." "Needs painted." Is it really that hard to type to be? I mean I just did it... Sheesh.

Well...that's the way we talk around here. At least I do, and I'm fairly edumacated and articyooluht. Seriously..."it needs washed" is what I'd say if I was looking at a dirty car. Clem

Then stop saying that! Gah!! It's wrong!! People speak like that here too, it bugs me to tears. People also say "might could" or "maybe could", as in "We might could wash that for ya if it didn't need fixed" and then I punch them.

Ooookaaaaaaayyyyy. I have my share of petpeaves, and I'm sure you have your vices. It's shorthand slang, for cryin' out loud. We're none of us perfect...

And for the record, I only say "might could" when intentionally trying to sound like...um...a hick. (no offense intended to any hicks, not that it matters).

It comes down to "picking your battles." I could try to talk like a perfect gentleman all the time and that would alienate me from most of the people around me (particularly at work...they don't understand me as it is...gotta dumb it down sometimes).

So some of it sticks.

Clem

"Runs great. needs a new head gasket, but as long as you put water in it maybe twice a day it never over heats. Great car if you need something cheap and working. "