How do i grow a beard?

92CelicaHalfTrac said:

Stupid thread, i know....

But i'm soon to be 26, and i still can't grow a beard.

It's okay.  I'll be 40 next year and anything I grow is patchy and unremarkable.  I can grow epic ear hair and have arm and leg hair like thick pubes but my face never grows anything over "Two Day Fez Movie Action Hero".

As a bonus, for the past year or so, a noticable chunk of it is white.  You don't want to be the guy with thick black hair and white facial hair.  It just doesn't work unless you're going for the Unabomber look.

I have native American in my genes, so even at 46, I can't grow a beard.  My mom's side has the Indian in it, and she doesn't have any facial hair either.  I blame her.

chandler said:

Not sure if canoe; but this thread was full of win back then. 

Including a post by Wally that should have all the upvotes. 

Duke said:

chandler said:

Not sure if canoe; but this thread was full of win back then. 

Including a post by Wally that should have all the upvotes. 

*searches for Wally's post*

...

In reply to chandler :

... prison bush ...

Trans_Maro said:

You guys sure can grow some nice prison bush.

Quotes for LOLs

AngryCorvair said:

Trans_Maro said:

You guys sure can grow some nice prison bush.

Quotes for LOLs

I still chuckled reading prison bush.

Jeez, this thread is so effen absurd. What have we become? And this started when, 2008? And somebody revived it now? Why? Either you have the ability to grow an effen beard or you don't. It's facial hair, either you have it or you don't. You can't change what you're born with. I'd like a dick like Porfirio Rubirosa (look him up). But I don't. Can we please close this thread ... like it should have nine years ago, or so. Who the eff revived this POS thread?

Gary said:

Jeez, this thread is so effen absurd. And it started when, 2008? And somebody revived it now? Why? Either you have the ability to grow a beard or you don't. It's facial hair, either you have it or you don't. You can't change what you're born with. I'd like a dick like Porfirio Rubirosa (Look it up). But I don't. Can we please close this thread ... like it should have nine years ago, or so. Who the eff revived it?

It was revived by a canoe, which was removed. Why would we close it?

Canoe? Removed? What the hell does that mean? Then why can we still post? BS Semantics. This is absurd.

Canoe = spammer. Yes, it's absurd. That's not against forum rules. This is the Off Topic section, after all.

In reply to Gary :

Geez, Gary, you're a lot less fun than this thread.

Gary said:

Canoe? Removed? What the hell does that mean? Then why can we still post? BS Semantics. This is absurd.

Whatevs.

Oh, I think this is fun. But is the OP really a spammer?

No, the op is not the spammer. Spammer posted in the thread recently, bringing it back to the top of the forum. This is referred to as a " zombie thread" because it's back from the dead. Spammer has since been removed. 

No, you big silly. It was revived from the dead by a spammer. The mods removed the spam in question, and the rest of us had a chuckle rereading it. 

If your Wheaties are currently floating in unidentified urine, feel free to find one of the hundreds of SRS BZNS threads elsewhere at this fine establishment. 

Gary, you really need one of these:

Sorry, I guess I just don't know the in's and out's of what's going on on the forum. Duke, I'm  sorry you think I'm a jackass. I personally wouldn't call you that. 

And oldsore, I wouldn't disrespect you either.

So if this thread has been contaminated, why not just lock it? I've noticed a few old threads revived like this one.  Sorry, I didn't know it was a spammer.

Gary said:

Sorry, I guess I just don't know the in's and out's of what's going on on the forum. Duke, I'm  sorry you think I'm a jackass. I personally wouldn't call you that. 

And oldsore, I wouldn't disrespect you either.

So if this thread has been contaminate, why not just lock it? I've noticed a few old threads revived.

 

Because the contamination was removed. There is no reason to lock the thread. 

In reply to Gary :

My apologies. Post edited. 

So, now I'm confused. How does one know that it's not a viable thread that's been revived by a valid poster? Is there an alert that it's a "zombie" thread? Or should we just know inherently?

Each post has a datestamp. If you are reading through and see a big jump in the dates, chances are it was revived by a spammer. On the previous page you will see my post that says canoe deleted,  and now you know that is the top secret code for spammer deleted. That should help you figure out that the old thread has been revived by spam.

Gary said:

And oldsore, I wouldn't disrespect you either.

 

And yet, you called me "oldsore"...

Ironically, there are some who would agree with you on that one.

In reply to EastCoastMojo:

Hmmm, while the forum is sometimes fun and informative, othertimes it's just complicated and bifurcated. So I guess I'll adjust my participation accordingly. Which means less.

Gary said:

In reply to EastCoastMojo:

Hmmm, while the forum is sometimes fun and informative, othertimes it's just complicated and bifurcated. So I guess I'll adjust my participation accordingly. Which means less.

 

Not sure how an old beard thread reached a level of complexity that necessitates a reduction in your participation, but do what you gotta do man.