How do I know if its time to move?

So I realized that with my divorce I don't have anything holding me to this area.  My job is solid and I have no clue if there's anything hiring back home, however my support network is a lot stronger back home than here.

Should I move?  How do I know if its time to do that?  I've always just gone with the whims of Uncle Sam, and I came down to Tampa because my soon-to-be-ex had a great job.  Now its up to me.

Are you happy, is something missing from your life?

How's your social network and social activity level? Do you seek change in that?

Really once you start asking that question, it's time.

Kids involved?  Sick or elderly parents you need to take care of?  No and no? 

Dude , I'd be up in Anchorage or in Wyoming.  I'd be in the camper wrenching on ski lifts or up in Minnesota working on snowmobiles or a guide on the rivers in Colorado.  

In reply to Datsun310Guy :

Important questions. Also: where is "back home"?

When you are moving TOWARDS something that is going to make your life appreciably better. Not just getting away from something*.

*(Not counting violence, famine, disease, or other direct threats to your life and health).

I like Beer Baron's answer.

For me, it's a long term feeling of not liking where I live.  I've been here for almost 10 years and have tried to like it, but I just don't.  Not sure if it will be 1 year or another 10, but I will move away from here. 

Having gone through a divorce recently, DO NOT underestimate the importance of a support network.  It's critical. 
 

The sense of loss and lack of mooring is terrible to deal with ongoing. 
 

Go where you feel supported. 

Divorce is a big shake up. Whether you realize it or not, you're probably reacting to it in many subtle or not so subtle ways. I'd wait a year or so before making any other big, life altering changes.

Being newly single offers some good opportunities to meet new people, try new things, and do what you want. I'd probably at least try to see what new things I can experience in the current place with the good job. You can always move away in a year or two if you're not able to find happiness.

Yes! With the notable exception of that time during which we are asleep, our body was designed to be in near constant motion.  So get up out of that chair....  and MOVE!  

You could do what I did for a while:  Buy a camper and visit the places you always wanted to see.  Stop in a town and get a job if you need money, but RV living is pretty cheap.

I had a CDL at the time, and I have never encountered a bus company that wasn't hiring drivers.  For a while in New Orleans I worked at a coffee shop.  Worked as a mechanic for a while in Austin.  I would stay in a place long enough to get a feel for it and test it out.  Sometimes it was a few weeks, sometimes it was 7 years.  

And where am I now?  Back home where I grew up.  Not really by choice.  I came home after my divorce and ended up getting a great job, meeting a great lady, and buying a cheap house.  But honestly, if it weren't for the lady, I'd be back in New Orleans or Los Angeles in a heartbeat.

Above all, lean on us, friend.  We're here.  Well, we're all over North America, but virtually here.

.... and I wouldn't mind a trip south.

Ok, let's see.

Not really a case of "if you're thinking of it, means its time to do it."  More a case of "I woke up the other day and the first thought that popped into my mind was 'I don't have anything holding me here, so if I don't want to, I don't have to live here anymore'."

Definitely not happy.  That's more the divorce than anything else though.  Job is ok enough, but could be more entertaining.  Social network/activity down here is hard to gauge.  At the age that all my friends have kids, doesn't mean much as I'm generally the fun "uncle" that comes around.  

Major change for social activity is going to be re-entering the dating pool.  I kind of feel like that will result in more quality down here, but more quantity back home (they're pretty, but the group I'd be hanging around with ain't that bright at times.)

No kids, Mom is gonna retire soonish and may move back home.  I do worry about Dad being out in the middle of the woods alone at his age, but both my sisters are one county over?

Home is Tallahassee, roughly 4 hours north so not a huge jump but I'm not likely to move out of Florida. (If I moved we'd be able to form the FloridaMan Triangle! a group that could rival the BDT!)

Not really interested in wandering around the country working.  If I had more of a cushion, maybe?  I want to start growing roots, I want to grow my skills at work and start building my life.  Just not sure where to do that.

In reply to Mr_Asa :

What do you do for a living?  Does "Wrench turner" mean you are a mechanic?

SV reX said:

In reply to Mr_Asa :

What do you do for a living?  Does "Wrench turner" mean you are a mechanic?

 

Thats a little out of date.  Also, I try not to put too much easily searchable info online.  Habit of a misspent youth.

Mechanical Engineer, currently working in Flood Mitigation.  Done a bit of everything, though.

In reply to Mr_Asa :

Gotcha

I've moved several times over the course of my life. I have followed the following hokey phrase when it comes to knowing when to move: "Home is where the heart is." Where's your heart? If you feel it's not where you live now, then maybe it's time to explore somewhere else. My advice for anyone is find a place that fits you - and don't follow what someone else says should fit you. That place is out there, but sometimes you have to wander a bit to find it. Best wishes to you!

If / When you're back in Tally, whether for a visit or something longer, hit me up, I'll buy you a beer and we can talk of poor automotive choices...

Curtis73 (Forum Supporter) said:

You could do what I did for a while:  Buy a camper and visit the places you always wanted to see.  Stop in a town and get a job if you need money, but RV living is pretty cheap.

I had a CDL at the time, and I have never encountered a bus company that wasn't hiring drivers.  For a while in New Orleans I worked at a coffee shop.  Worked as a mechanic for a while in Austin.  I would stay in a place long enough to get a feel for it and test it out.  Sometimes it was a few weeks, sometimes it was 7 years.  

And where am I now?  Back home where I grew up.  Not really by choice.  I came home after my divorce and ended up getting a great job, meeting a great lady, and buying a cheap house.  But honestly, if it weren't for the lady, I'd be back in New Orleans or Los Angeles in a heartbeat.

I've seriously considered this life, moreso since the wife's job skill can be done remotely fairly easily

ToManyProjects said:

If / When you're back in Tally, whether for a visit or something longer, hit me up, I'll buy you a beer and we can talk of poor automotive choices...

I'll be back and forth a bit no matter what I choose.  Got a bunch of E36 M3 to move and Dad has 40 acres. (Hi, Dad!)

I'll give you a yell when I'm in town one of these days.  See you at the Challenge, in the meantime?

Mr_Asa said:

ToManyProjects said:

If / When you're back in Tally, whether for a visit or something longer, hit me up, I'll buy you a beer and we can talk of poor automotive choices...

I'll be back and forth a bit no matter what I choose.  Got a bunch of E36 M3 to move and Dad has 40 acres. (Hi, Dad!)

I'll give you a yell when I'm in town one of these days.  See you at the Challenge, in the meantime?

Cool, I look forward to it.

Unfortunately we've got family coming the same weekend as the challenge, and I don't think I'll be able to make any of it. I'll make it to a challenge eventually... I swear...

Moving when unhappy with life may allow a person to rationalize a plan which might not otherwise make sense to them.  Tread carefully.  My move to Baltimore was very much a "I really want out of here badly right now" move that I regret, but more from my taking a not god job just to make the move happen (I kind of miss the promise of Baltimore now and then).  I am just saying to be careful with this kind of thing.

It kind of sounds like you're doing fine where you are, or at least about as fine as you could anywhere else at this point.  If family situations like your dad increases the pull to come back you can always go when you're needed. 

Scotty Con Queso said:

I like Beer Baron's answer.

For me, it's a long term feeling of not liking where I live.  I've been here for almost 10 years and have tried to like it, but I just don't.  Not sure if it will be 1 year or another 10, but I will move away from here. 

Time to move!!!

In the case of someone saying "I've lived here for a decade, I have never really liked it, I've tried in one way or another but it didn't work" then I would agree on moving on.  But make a list of what you want in a place, what your current place lacks, and why those things are important.  Then go looking for the new place.  Slow and steady is my recommendation.

Beer Baron said:

When you are moving TOWARDS something that is going to make your life appreciably better. Not just getting away from something

QFT. Don't move until you have decided what you want out of your new life going forward.