To the woman that crop dusted Ray's Pizza tonight. Holy Hopping berkeley. your next stop should have been the hospital to find out what the hell is festering in you. An entire restaurant stopped eating in disgust. I tried to wait it out but couldn't and spent the rest of my meal break in a payphone trying to stay dry. The aroma of stale urine was refreshing after the olifactory assault you produced.
Why do twits keep making me send PDFs with my 'signature' instead of letting me just write things in the body of the email? It's my name, and if I tell you the unicode letters that comprise it are my valid consent, then they are. If you make me send you a "signed" PDF I'm just going to do it in Photoshop anyway and "sign" it with the mouse, so it's not like you're getting any 'personal touch' or whatever you think makes one way of encoding information more valid than some other way of encoding it. I don't even have the "one true signature" that your 18th-century thinking expects; I sign my name about ten different ways depending on how I feel or what the weather's like or whether I've yet had anything to drink that day, even when I use a pen, so there's a good chance anything I "sign" isn't going to match any other documents you have from me. The fact that you never check or even question me about this just underscores my point that the whole process is a farce.
...And holy balls no am I ever not going to "print out, sign, and scan" whatever you want me to do that with. Get with the decade. Or the one before that. Or even the one before that (y'know, the one with M.C. Hammer all over it.) The technology not to have to do that has existed since ARPANet, but I'll grant you the '70s and the '80s as a "transition period." See, I'm reasonable.
Wait, I've got it, I'll just change my handwriting to 10-point Nimbus Sans L. What are you going to say then, chumps?
If your child is in a car accident where they haven't been critically injured...
...and you call your insurance company to report a claim...
...and you don't have any information yourself on what happened (names, phones, tags, police)...
...and the explanation you offered is that your child is only 17 and was shook-up and didn't know to get any information from being in an accident...
...perhaps you as a parent should re-evaluate if this child is equipped with the emotional and intellectual tools to be allowed to be driving, or that you have properly equipped them to be driving.
Dear videogame designers: Not all of us who are serious about motorsport can afford the subscription fees (or the "high-end" PC) required to leave the console gaming world behind, and use iRacing or Simraceway.
It would be a wonderful display of compassion on your part if you would simply provide a simple menu choice to disable the ridiculous pus-sucking, HIV positive "ghost cars" for ever, and ever, and ever--in every product you produce. I have no desire to witness in person how some 13yr old managed to manipulate your coding in a search to "beat the game". I use cockpit view, I turn the biggest cheat ("suggested line") off, and have no desire to see the efforts of others who were too cowardly to do the same. The listed lap time, and the provided split times are quite enough of an inspiration for me.
And I'll bet that I could actually lap within a half a second of the little bastards if I could JUST SEE DOWN THE berkeleyING ROAD.
Dear National Guard
I understand I signed a contract, and I intend to see it through to the end. But as I'm not deploy, and you won't be sending me to school to change my MOS, is it really necessary to spray me with mace and taser me for certification I can't get?
Dear Oldsmobile engineers. berkeley you. You suck. You motherberkeleying harry but rash poltron wart nibbling pettifogger snollygostering dickflaping debutarding mouth-breathing trollywopping egg-sucking dumbE36 M3s should burn in hell.
Herp derp.
I ordered some bitchin Raybestos ST43 track pads for the rally Tal[hoon], supposed to be best of the best. My car is a 1990, as anyone who knows DSMs, the brakes were changed to a dual caliper in 93.
Well wadda ya know, someone changed my calipers out for the dual pistons. My special $250 pads are now worthless for me, and I sincerely doubt they can be returned or traded, especially after I quadruple insured they were for single piston calipers. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
OK. So I started college. And trying to be a good student I bought my books weeks in advance. And then you cancelled one of my classes. So now I'm out $175 AND I don't even get this book, because I had to take the same course from a different teacher who used a different book. Thanks for nothing.
Drewsifer wrote: OK. So I started college. And trying to be a good student I bought my books weeks in advance. And then you cancelled one of my classes. So now I'm out $175 AND I don't even get this book, because I had to take the same course from a different teacher who used a different book. Thanks for nothing.
it's a conspiracy I tell ya 
^^^ a few possible suggestions
1) buy used books
2) buy used books ON EBAY
3) buy paperback editions of the same text (often online)
4) buy from an off-campus store
Dear FedEx,
Thanks for sending my car parts from Bloomington, CA to Chicago, IL to Cedar Rapids, IA, back to Chicago, IL on their way to Appleton, WI. This is the third time you've revised the delivery date.
Thanks, Ross.
fasted58 wrote:Drewsifer wrote: OK. So I started college. And trying to be a good student I bought my books weeks in advance. And then you cancelled one of my classes. So now I'm out $175 AND I don't even get this book, because I had to take the same course from a different teacher who used a different book. Thanks for nothing.it's a conspiracy I tell ya
I came to believe that we're all in the wrong business. We need to supply text books. Paid my share when I went after I retired from the army and for both of my daughters going to college. One is still going. Sometimes pay almost as much for books as tuition. 
And it's always my luck they won't buy them back because the next semester is using a different revision.
Daughters found a place online you can rent them from now.
wlkelley3 wrote: And it's always my luck they won't buy them back because the next semester is using a different revision.
Check the author. It will be some professor who has the scam worked out. Add a paragraph, re-issue the book, sell many books, make lots of dough.
Bennetts Advance Pep Zone and other retail auto parts stores. Is it that hard to stock red and black battery cables in top mount and side mount in all the lengths available from the house brand offered at your store? When we want to replace the cables we want to just walk in, go to the rack, and buy the cables that are the correct or slightly longer length than our measurement.
We do not want to call or visit store after store trying to locate correct length, color and mount style. Just once I'd like to find a pair of MATCHING red/black, correct length, and mounting style in the same retail location.
mtn wrote: 3 weeks from graduation, probably 30-50 applications sent out, no job. /rant.
You ain't alone brother
Graduated last May, no work since August, lost count of jobs applied to (over 30 companies in the last 2 months, multiple positions with each company)
I have my second interview since August coming up next week.
WHY do you title a position "entry level" then require 10 berkeleyING YEARS experience.. FOR ENTRY LEVEL !?!?!?!?!?!
Noone seems willing to hire you, THEN get you a security clearance. NONONO, they require you to have one to start with, FOR ENTRY LEVEL.
Why the hell do they advertise janitorial positions as "Engineer", Job listing " Cleaning floors, replacing lightbulbs, emptying garbage cans, etc..." Yeah, berkeley you too!
Heres a rant I will put in for my girlfriends sake... She has a Masters Degree in Public History (for being a museum curator), in her field all the places want you to VOLUNTEER for a few years before they will consider you for a job. Yup, work for FREE for a few years and MAYBE we will pay you to do something later. BTW, GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR COLLEGE LOANS!!! (love her to death, she has a good volunteer position to get things rolling, but that system for that field is broken as hell!)
Okay, everyone hates a left lane cruiser, thats common. But what drives me batE36 M3 crazy is when someone does that crap going the same speed as the car in the right lane and finally pass them gets over into the right lane and takes off. Then you guessed it, when they get to next car to pass they slow the berkeley down again in the left lane until they clear the car, get in the right lane and take off again. I berkeleying hate you.
Also. I hate the berkeleytards that when they see a cop with someone pulled over on the side of the road and hit their brake pedal when they are already going 5-10 mph UNDER the speed limit. And no I am not talking about hitting the brakes so they can get over a lane to give the cop space, no no, just hit the brakes to let everyone around them know that they see a cop with his berkeleying lights on. Good for you, you really have such keen eyes to see a police car but somehow not keen enough to see you are 10 under and he is out of his car anyways! Man, I really hate the general public.
One more for good measure.
shiny happy people of the nation's parkinglots. WTF is wrong with you people that treat finding the closest available parking spot to the front door of the store you are going to like its a game that saves you time or energy or awards you sexual favors. Parking in a berkeleying space instead of looping around the parkinglot nearly causing an accident. You do not win anything, you do not pass go and collect $200, and no one is impressed with your parking prowess.
Dear Comcast Business Class:
Berkeley you. You sent me FIVE mailings already this week. It's berkeleying Tuesday. STOP WASTING TREES!!!
PS - You don't even have internet to our freaking building!!!!
Dear Supervisor,
If you REQUIRE me to write up and submit a two-page abstract for the upcoming symposium, you should probably have told me, you know, 3 months ago rather than now, two weeks before the deadline. And if you DO tell me two weeks before the deadline, you shouldn't follow that up with a comment about how much work I've got to do. I know. One BIG project, which you've temporarily distracted me from already by dumping several last-minute desgin emergencies in my lap. You want a berkleying abstract from me on short notice? Don't expect me to do it off the clock. Your boss didn't say he required abstracts from your group; just that he's still looking for them.
For the record, I'd have been totally fine with writing an abstract and subsequently allowing you to brown-nose your boss. IF you had come to me 3 MONTHS AGO.
Kthxbai,
JIK
Traffic circles really aren't that complex. They even put up a sign explaining how it works. Figure it out of find a different route.
Dear local bike shop,
When I ask for a specific set of bars, and you don't have them, it's probably best not to add, "no, we only have good ones in stock". Insulting my choice is probably not going to encourage my patronage.
Dear competing bike shop,
When you tell me you can order something in, and have it before race day, don't wait until I drive 20 minutes to pay for them before you check with your supplier and find out that they're on backorder for 3 months.
Dear Fellow Vehicle Operators:
Driving is, without a doubt, the most dangerous thing you do every day. It is also where you have the most potential to almost instantaneously destroy multiple lives.
So don't berkeleying say you don't see why you should have to learn to properly operate a vehicle because in your humble ass opinion it is a necessary evil and you just don't want to put that much effort into it.
(This rant is the result of a mother/daughter conversation I overheard tonight, neither felt they should have to take the time to learn to properly operate a vehicle. It was all I could do not to leap from the chair, tear off their heads and E36 M3 down their necks.).
People who accelerate slowly, but to a high cruising speed, on typical multi-lane streets need to be shot. They are ALWAYS in the way. At every light you are stuck behind them as they putt away, but by the time the right lane clears and you get a shot at going around, they are moving fast enough that you can't make it before encountering slower traffic or another red light. Lather, rinse, repeat until you want to throttle them.
Joint pain sucks, I want my Kung Foo grip back, that and my eyesight. NOW........... thank you.
TRoglodyte wrote: Joint pain sucks, I want my Kung Foo grip back, that and my eyesight. NOW........... thank you.
whatcha doin' for the joint pain? it's always something... ankle over the winter, then the knees, now my knuckles and wrists are a killin' me... to the point I need to see a doc
approaching 54 here, too young for that chit
I know the feeling, the little finger on my left hand goes numb all the time. If I hold a phone up to my left ear for a long time (like over 10 min) the whole hand goes numb. It's a PITA, but I have to get insurance again first before having docs look at it.
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