He settled down for a brief nap.
now he's laying there sucking on his pacifier and twisting and wiggling around. He's a very strong baby and seems to be experimenting with his muscles. He likes to randomly kick his legs and reach out for things with his fingers and wow he's got a grip!
In reply to infinitenexus :
Congratulations man.
Keep that baby strength in mind, especially if you have a lot of steps at home. Mine was particularly suicidal the first few months. Only time she'd ever get squirmy and try to get out of people's arms was on the steps, and they can be surprisingly determined for something so small.
A lot of company's act like we have families so we can work... but they are wrong. There may be lots of need to be there for your wife an the little one. You'll never regret taking the time you need for that - but will if ya don't. Work will either understand, or, well there is always work!
Look at it this way. Wasn't long ago you had more money coming in with no job, than I had working 45+ hours/week. You proved you could do something with that. So you know you can survive anything! Family first... just like your doing!
Congrats on becoming a father! I hope your wife has a speedy recovery. Very similar to our first, 2 days of labor followed by an emergency c section. My wife swore we would stop at one. We ended up with three.
Check into family leave in your state. Here in CA, I believe I got 6 weeks paid leave (around 2/3 pay, but not taxed if I remember correctly.) I used 2 or three weeks after each kid was born to help my wife recover (all c sections) then used the remainder after her leave was up.
I did a quick search and this looks like what you would be eligible for in Ohio...
looks like the pay kicks in after 2 weeks.
Edit- If I'm reading it correctly, you should be eligible for 2 weeks off unpaid (you can use your vacation or sick time) and then you get the next 4 weeks paid. You continue to accrue vacation and sick time with your employer as if you were working.
Double Edit- your wife may also be eligible for this AFTER her regular maternity leave. I think my wife took both maternity leave and family leave. I used the remainder of my leave after she finished hers. By stringing our leaves together, we able to have one of us stay with the baby for around 3 months. While all babies are different, my experience is that they are easier to care for after they hit a magic 3 month mark.
I casually brought up how I wished my company did paternity leave as I was texting updates with the lady that handles all the billing for the company. She turned around and spoke with the owner, who passed along to my manager to give me 5 more days of PTO. So now I'll be on PTO until next Wednesday, which is a huge help. Before that got approved I was planning on going into work tomorrow and then working remotely on Friday.
Alessa has been super nauseous all day due to some of the medications she's on, so of course she's been heaving and almost puking. The worst part is that to minimize any movement of her guts, when she heaves I push in on her stomach. Right where she has all that damage. So needless to say, it's no fun she finally exorcist vomited out whatever was in her stomach so she's a bit better now. She fed Avi again and he's been napping since then, and so has she. She's finally getting some much needed rest. We're still waiting on the blood transfusion. They put in for it 4 hours ago.
A lady came in to get some blood from Avi to run some tests so I comforted him while she jabbed him in the heel. He cried out twice, then once quietly, then went right back to sucking on his pacifier. I probably would have cried out more than that had someone jabbed me in the heel. So of course I started crying because he's such a good boy.
infinitenexus said:So of course I started crying because he's such a good boy.
Welcome to fatherhood...and sleep deprivation =)
I'd echo the guy who recommended a support network. If you can't fly a friend or family member in, then talk to your church/synagogue/mosque/local bar and see if anybody could come over if an emergency happened, or if you guys just need to take a nap.
Failing that, checkout care.com and find somebody who is experienced with newborns. 20$/hr is dirt cheap if they're giving your wife more time to sleep and recover.
In reply to infinitinfinitenexus:
Congrats! Glad everyone is doing ok.
That extra 5 days of PTO is good news. Another option you may consider is using FMLA. FMLA gives you up to 12 unpaid weeks off during the 12 month period following the birth of a child. With one of my kids, I applied for intermittent FMLA, which allowed me to take 2 weeks off initially, and then take a day or two off each week during the following months. It was nice, because even though I didn't get full paychecks, I was able to skip work without jeopardizing my job due to missing work. I would also see if you could get some WFH days for the first few weeks, if money is a little tight. Best of luck :)
Those extra days are great. Still worry that she won't be ready but maybe you can use those days to streamline the process for her.
Boost_Crazy said:Check into family leave in your state. Here in CA, I believe I got 6 weeks paid leave (around 2/3 pay, but not taxed if I remember correctly.) I used 2 or three weeks after each kid was born to help my wife recover (all c sections) then used the remainder after her leave was up.
In many cases you need to have worked at that job for some period (6 months sticks in my head) to qualify for the paternity leave.
Congrats on being a father! Mine are 15 and 11 -- I don't know if it gets easier, but the challenges do change as they get older. :)
Great news in the 5 more days. At least it shows the co. is trying to care. Your wife, I think, could use your help longer than that. Unpaid time off sure hurts, but you've proved there are always ways to work that out.
Although as Stampie said, cave men raised kids, and plenty of us older folks didn't have our dads home... I doubt my dad took one day off, and my sister is 16 months older than me, so Mom had her hands full! On second thought there, considering how "well adjusted" I am, maybe you SHOULD take off!!!
I agree ... you don't want Avi to turn out like 03Panther.
I love how big his hands look in the newest photo. I suspect that he's going to be a strong, gentle protector of those whom he cares for.
Congrats! My wife had 4 c-sections and each was nervewracking, and your wife's sounded particularly E36 M3ty. Good luck to you with the noob and on her recovery. Good news on the extra PTO they will need your help. If swmbo hasn't pooped yet, good luck, that was always the surprise once we were home. 
Congrats!
The days of PTO is a life saver. I can't imagine going to work tomorrow. My boss said we can work out some work from home days - the IT department where I work is very small, only a handful of us and so any one person missing makes things tough. My boss is also okay with my wife coming in and visiting me as long as work still gets done, so if she needs to come into the office some that's fine as well. That'll help. Overall I know things will be good.
Here's a positive picture! Two days after I saw her intestines and uterus outside of her body, she's walking! She did two laps around this section of the hospital and could have walked further but the catheter is irritating her (so they're removing it now, also good). We're going to do another three laps in the morning
(also yes I got her permission to post such a non-flattering photo haha)
As of now we're planning on staying here until Friday. I think she's going to improve a lot by then. Avi is in the nursery right now and the charge nurse is loving all over him and we're going to leave him in there for another few hours so The Wife can get some guaranteed rest.
Stampie said:I agree ... you don't want Avi to turn out like 03Panther.
Hey, I've got papers that say I'm perfectly normal... ok maybe that's not quite what they say...
In reply to infinitenexus :
Tell her that she looks great for what she's just gone though.
It is the most beautiful journey , take your time ,breathe a little and do just a little better than your parents. Kids are the truest form of love .
God bless your wife, wow that's a lot. Congratulations on the healthy baby, that's really the most important thing. Also, seconding Stampie; please tell your wife she looks great. I hope it gets easier from here for both of you.
Congrats!
More good news: she got her blood transfusion yesterday evening, and after that and some rest she had her catheter removed. This morning she was able to take a shower and we went 4 laps around this area in the hospital. We took Avi with us so technically this was our first family walk I made sure to grab a photo
Avi has a big appetite and has been feeding regularly. We should be leaving the hospital in about a week. I read a book to Avi for the first time this morning so of course I started crying by the end of the first sentence lol.
It miraculous how fast the body heals. It's not the same but when my mom had a heart bypass they had her up and walking hours after she had her ribcage sawn apart. Amazing
I'm glad to see she's up and walking around and everyone is on the up and up!
In reply to Antihero (Forum Supporter) :
Modern medicine is absolutely amazing, I can't count the ways that I'm so thankful for it.
captdownshift (Forum Supporter) said:In reply to Antihero (Forum Supporter) :
Modern medicine is absolutely amazing, I can't count the ways that I'm so thankful for it.
Absolutely, like I said earlier in the thread.....82 gallons of blood went into my dad.
It's incredible
First dad/son nap!
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