Tales From Dishonest Used Car Dealership

If you have some time to waste and want to read some excellent stories of automotive shenanigans, boy do I have the reddit posts for you:
The first of many Tales From Dishonest Used Car Dealership

There are a whole bunch, which can be found here. I strongly recommend reading them in chronological order for the best effect.

STOP! Don't click on the links! Your productivity will be done for the day! At least wait til your boss is gone for the day.

...and whatever you do, don't go to r/justrolledintotheshop.

Given the interaction I've had with a used car dealer in the last 36 hours, I had to read a couple of these. They are quite entertaining, at least for anyone not directly involved.

EDIT: Just came across my favorite line thus far: "I noticed CR was surprisingly quiet, until he butted into the yelling and relayed a cunning plan. It hinged on the absolute stupidity of whoever was taking the car. This ordinarily might have been a problem, but being that it was probably a salesperson who took it, betting on idiocy meant the trap was foolproof."

My Dad sold cars for almost 30 years. Man, does he have some stories. Too much to post and not enough time.

A couple quick ones though: He worked at a sketchy buy-here, pay-here in South Florida for a few months. AT LEAST once a week, the buyer would say "How much is the payment wit da late fee?"

He also worked at a Dodge dealership in WV in the early 70's. Sold a new Dodge Dart to a little old lady...who was promised the car would get AMAZING gas mileage.

She came in a few weeks after the purchase complaining about fuel economy.

He took her to a local gas station where the pumps were on a slight hill, and parked the car on the side of the pump that would allow him to put the most fuel in.

I'm making up numbers here, but they took something like a 40 mile ride on mostly straight, gently sloped roads. Whenever there was a hill, he'd get her talking about her grandkids, the weather, etc, and would subtly get on the gas downhill and coast uphill, being sure to make mostly right-hand turns, as to be stopped as little as possible.

When they got back to the gas station, he parked on the OPPOSITE side of the pump, and told her to put as much gas in the tank as she could.

She got something like 45mpg.

Well, that link is seriously cutting into my productivity today.

APEowner wrote: Well, that link is seriously cutting into my productivity today.

Amen to that.

Puts me in mind of Acts Of Gord, and it's a similar time suck.

These stories are more then accurate of what i saw from my time working at a Toyota dealership washing cars in high school.

I don't have some time to waste, but I'm oddly drawn in anyway...

Welp, there goes what little productivity I had queued up for today.

Good thing it's Friday because I'm enjoying these.

I read every one. Why didn't he write more?

I read them all when they came out. I love reading them again.

APEowner wrote: Well, that link is seriously cutting into my productivity today.

In the comments

"..there's no one to report my boss to if he throws a pipe wrench at my head, which did happen (it missed, went through a customers windshield)"

"In his defense, I probably deserved it"

slefain wrote:

APEowner wrote: Well, that link is seriously cutting into my productivity today.

Sadly, your warning was posted after I was sucked in. Thank you though.

This is The Daily WTF for car guys. Excellent.

Yep. Read them all. Wish there were more.

For a second I thought this might be one of my co-workers

Made it through about six of them. Interesting how every organization has someone (ITG) who does nothing yet stays employed because they know where the bodies are buried. The tale of his demise was my favorite.

I'm through about three of them. These are AWESOME!

Literally burned about 6 hours of my day reading these.

I'm so sad I reached the end of his stories

Edit: found there is a second page

I just can't read that Reddit stuff. The format looks like it's from the early days of the internet