We drove the Sequoia today. I'll be honest....the interior is awesome, the features are awesome, the engine is excellent. We drove the 4Runner there. Driving the Sequoia I might as well have come there in a go-kart. I obviously knew in advance that the Sequoia was larger (1300lbs, 15" length, 4" width) than the 4runner, but in reality, it felt about 3 times the size. Even at 6'0 with the seat adjusted, I couldn't even see over the monster hood, and though the suspension feels nice and the ride was great, it feels every bit of 3 tons, if not more. I really didn't enjoy it at all other than the short jaunt we did on the highway. It honestly just felt ridiculous to drive something that size anywhere other than the open highway.
Wife (5'7) literally couldn't tell where the vehicle was, had the seat max height with her head almost touching the roof, and still couldn't see over the hood. We had the 4Runner parked next to it (wish I had a camera) and you can't get a feel about just how big the Sequoia is until you see it next to a midsize SUV like the 4Runner (which is not "small" on the outside). I think the 4Runner could have parked inside the Sequoia.
It was also funny watching wife climb up into it like Billy Joe Bob climbing into his tractor trailer.
Bottom line: we ruled it out. Just too berkeleying big, and even I with my need for 5k+ towing can't even come close to justifying it. If it was a diesel, that might sway me a bit....but no.
Unrelated note, we also drove the opposite end of the 3-row SUV spectrum: MDX. Third row seat is useless for anything but kids or small adults under 5'6. But damn is it a nice driver. It felt about as big as my WRX, felt damn near as fast, and handled awesome. I'm strongly thinking about the smaller RDX when I get rid of the WRX in a couple years.....never been in a sport-ute that handled like the MDX did: very, very impressive and a really great interior to boot. The SH-AWD I managed to get doing its job with a bit of hooning on a road covered with salt/sand from our recent snow. Grip is pretty impressive.
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Our last ditch here is to look at the new (11+) Durango with the 5.7 V8, which shares the chassis with the GL-class Benz and Grand Cherokee and supposedly is pretty carlike in its handling (especially the R/T), has good power, and three real rows. A bit hesitant about Dodge quality coming from a Toyota, but maybe I'm being a bit ridiculous....
If that doesn't work, it's Acadia (provided I can find one with a 2nd-row bench AND tow package, which is apparently a unicorn) or Odyssey (kill me now, don't care how great minivans are, the Odyssey drives like a boring heavy box on wheels).
