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unevolved
unevolved Dork
3/4/13 2:55 p.m.

So I was doing some maintenance for a friend of Mrs. Unevolved who's not very mechanically inclined. They got this 2002 Protege5 from a family member for about $2K or so, and it's had a rough life. I pulled the wheels off, and didn't find anything major, until I checked the oil.

Nothing.

Huh, that can't be right. They drove about an hour to get here. Tried again. Still nothing.

So I drained the oil. This is what I found:

Yep. That's right. Less than a quart and a half of oil left. Looks like it leaked from the last oil filter change, or maybe from a rear main seal gone bad. Hard to tell when it was all over the engine. So I filled it up and sent them on their way with strict instructions to religiously check the oil and keep me updated. They can't afford a different car, so our best bet is to try and keep this one on the road for as long as possible. I give it 20K before that engine just falls out. Thankfully they don't drive much.

Swank Force One
Swank Force One MegaDork
3/4/13 3:05 p.m.

I see these cars with the engine bays just totally CAKED in oil all the time. I don't think i've actually seen one wrecked yet... just completely berkeleyed from oil leaks.

The last one had less than 60k miles on it.

egnorant
egnorant Dork
3/4/13 3:05 p.m.

90% chance they will not check the oil again until something explodes. Can't tell you how many times I have seen someone who "can"t" afford an oil change, radiator check, brake pads and such somehow able to afford payments on a $1000 car (which they paid $3000) every 2 years.

Bruce

DuctTape&Bondo
DuctTape&Bondo HalfDork
3/4/13 3:26 p.m.
egnorant wrote: 90% chance they will not check the oil again until something explodes. Can't tell you how many times I have seen someone who "can"t" afford an oil change, radiator check, brake pads and such somehow able to afford payments on a $1000 car (which they paid $3000) every 2 years. Bruce

And they'll blame you because you worked on it.

Enyar
Enyar Reader
3/4/13 3:32 p.m.
unevolved wrote: So I was doing some maintenance for a friend of Mrs. Unevolved who's not very mechanically inclined. They got this 2002 Protege5 from a family member for about $2K or so, and it's had a rough life. I pulled the wheels off, and didn't find anything major, until I checked the oil. Nothing. Huh, that can't be right. They drove about an hour to get here. Tried again. Still nothing. So I drained the oil. This is what I found: Yep. That's right. Less than a quart and a half of oil left. Looks like it leaked from the last oil filter change, or maybe from a rear main seal gone bad. Hard to tell when it was all over the engine. So I filled it up and sent them on their way with strict instructions to religiously check the oil and keep me updated. They can't afford a different car, so our best bet is to try and keep this one on the road for as long as possible. I give it 20K before that engine just falls out. Thankfully they don't drive much.

Please tell me it is yellow and you live in Florida. I had a friend / coworker who claimed that with today's oils, you don't need to do oil changes anymore...just top off everyonce and a while. Last I heard he went like 23k without an oil change.

Streetwiseguy
Streetwiseguy UltraDork
3/4/13 3:40 p.m.
Enyar wrote: Please tell me it is yellow and you live in Florida. I had a friend / coworker who claimed that with today's oils, you don't need to do oil changes anymore...just top off everyonce and a while. Last I heard he went like 23k without an oil change.

Musta been hanging around an Amsoil salesman.

Ian F
Ian F PowerDork
3/4/13 3:41 p.m.

In reply to Enyar:

But if he's topping it off, at least he's checking it once in awhile...

dean1484
dean1484 UberDork
3/4/13 4:00 p.m.
DuctTape&Bondo wrote:
egnorant wrote: 90% chance they will not check the oil again until something explodes. Can't tell you how many times I have seen someone who "can"t" afford an oil change, radiator check, brake pads and such somehow able to afford payments on a $1000 car (which they paid $3000) every 2 years. Bruce
And they'll blame you because you worked on it.

This. I stopped working on cars for "friends" and extended family. These cars turns in to a form of herpes.

Yep fix a tail light and when the radiator starts leaking next week it is some how your fault. I am so done with those people.

Travis_K
Travis_K UltraDork
3/4/13 4:11 p.m.

It's always the people who complain that they can't afford a car that do stuff like that. I agree, I would be very surprised if they check the oil again at all.

mtn
mtn PowerDork
3/4/13 4:25 p.m.
egnorant wrote: 90% chance they will not check the oil again until something explodes. Can't tell you how many times I have seen someone who "can"t" afford an oil change, radiator check, brake pads and such somehow able to afford payments on a $1000 car (which they paid $3000) every 2 years. Bruce

Sounds like they just bought it from a family member, so don't give up all hope quite yet.

unevolved
unevolved Dork
3/4/13 4:35 p.m.
mtn wrote:
egnorant wrote: 90% chance they will not check the oil again until something explodes. Can't tell you how many times I have seen someone who "can"t" afford an oil change, radiator check, brake pads and such somehow able to afford payments on a $1000 car (which they paid $3000) every 2 years. Bruce
Sounds like they just bought it from a family member, so don't give up all hope quite yet.

Yep. They brought it to me as soon as they acquired it, because they knew it was needing attention, they just didn't know what.

FranktheTank
FranktheTank New Reader
3/4/13 4:41 p.m.

When we first started dating. I had to poke my ex's drain plug with a screwdriver to get the oil to start flowing in her truck. It looked like gear lube mixed with axle grease.

From what i could gather it had been over 20k miles on that oil. I give every woman a chance... If she can't figure out her own oil change, air filter and a tire change after I've shown her twice. She gets declared legally too high maintenance and gets replaced.

Knurled
Knurled UltraDork
3/4/13 5:04 p.m.

We get that a lot. Sometimes the oil pan only trickles out, most of the oil in the engine is in the filter.

Datsun310Guy
Datsun310Guy UberDork
3/4/13 5:18 p.m.
FranktheTank wrote: When we first started dating. I had to poke my ex's drain plug with a screwdriver to get the oil to start flowing in her truck.

This sounds like your using some kind of sex "code" words.........

That's what she said.

petegossett
petegossett UberDork
3/4/13 5:36 p.m.

In reply to Datsun310Guy:

+1

thestig99
thestig99 HalfDork
3/4/13 6:06 p.m.

In the fall I traded a nice, very well maintained, 2001 Audi A4 to a friend. He in turn sold it to his brother. A few weeks ago they noticed it was leaking oil. Then someone checked the oil and found the dipstick was dry.

He kept driving it until it stalled and would turn over. Took 3 quarts of oil to even show up on the dipstick. Compression test shows zero on all 4 cylinders. I traded it with 200k. It now has 202.

Kids

poopshovel
poopshovel UltimaDork
3/4/13 6:33 p.m.

Before reading, I saw the pic and thought those were 5 gallon buckets. "Hollleee chit, that's a lotta oil!!! Did they fill till poured out the cap?!?!?"

aussiesmg
aussiesmg UltimaDork
3/4/13 6:50 p.m.
poopshovel wrote: Before reading, I saw the pic and thought those were 5 gallon buckets. "Hollleee chit, that's a lotta oil!!! Did they fill till poured out the cap?!?!?"

We have a local kid who had been losing oil, so he started topping it off, every week he topped the oil. Engine started losing power and it ran rough so he finally brought it in for a check.

Pulled the dipstick and it was all covered, wiped it off and it was still all covered.

Turns out while he kept topping it off, he failed to check the oil level to see if it actually needed any.

Engine was full.

Knurled
Knurled UltraDork
3/4/13 6:56 p.m.

We had a 2.5 Cougar come in with 3 gallons of oil in it.

Yes, it was puking oil from every seal.

turboswede
turboswede PowerDork
3/4/13 7:00 p.m.
Datsun310Guy wrote:
FranktheTank wrote: When we first started dating. I had to poke my ex's drain plug with a screwdriver to get the oil to start flowing in her truck.
This sounds like your using some kind of sex "code" words......... That's what she said.

"...just the tip"

Donebrokeit
Donebrokeit HalfDork
3/4/13 7:06 p.m.

Apparently you guy have never owned a Chrysler slant six /6 Oil is an option, you only need about three table spoons of oil to go 10K miles. Trust me

But for a modern engine that little bit of oil is next to nothing. Good luck to the new owner.

FranktheTank
FranktheTank New Reader
3/4/13 7:07 p.m.

Sadly women are not cars... You can't fix them up. When you break one you just have to trade her in... at a terrible loss. I usually make money on cars. Ha

I once had an air cooled 2.9 liter Ranger. Coolant was unnecessary. I've seen people try to blow up the Ford 3.0 and fail miserably. When the nukes start flying there will only be Cher, cockroaches and 3 liter rangers left on earth.

Will
Will Dork
3/4/13 7:07 p.m.
Streetwiseguy wrote: Musta been hanging around an Amsoil salesman.

The Jonestown cult has nothing on the cult of Amsoil.

dean1484
dean1484 UberDork
3/4/13 7:12 p.m.
FranktheTank wrote: When we first started dating. I had to poke my ex's drain plug with a screwdriver to get the oil to start flowing in her truck. It looked like gear lube mixed with axle grease. From what i could gather it had been over 20k miles on that oil. I give every woman a chance... If she can't figure out her own oil change, air filter and a tire change after I've shown her twice. She gets declared legally too high maintenance and gets replaced.

I will make one exception. If she strait up tells you she can no / will not do it but has the cence to take it in for an oil change / filter etc when the sticker on the dash that I put there said to. I can live with that.

Mmadness
Mmadness New Reader
3/4/13 7:39 p.m.
thestig99 wrote: In the fall I traded a nice, very well maintained, 2001 Audi A4 to a friend. He in turn sold it to his brother. A few weeks ago they noticed it was leaking oil. Then someone checked the oil and found the dipstick was dry. He kept driving it until it stalled and would turn over. Took 3 quarts of oil to even show up on the dipstick. Compression test shows zero on all 4 cylinders. I traded it with 200k. It now has 202. Kids

Jeez, I could start a multi-volume series on dumb things kids at my school do with cars.

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