Let's hear it. Worst traffic citation.

My one and only is pretty mild, but annoying nonetheless.

Intersection of 8 Mile Rd and John R Rd in Hazel Park Michigan. Coming back from a grocery run at the Warren Meijer. Noticed the yellow a bit late and it went red as I passed under it. I get lit up, cop gets my paperwork and asks me what my driving record is like, no questions about my passenger, if my car was full of illegal guns and drugs, etc. Cop comes back hands me a $150 non moving violation ticket for "impeding traffic". This is a no points ticket, a red light ticket is $130 and 2 points, so fighting it is stupid. They do this to people all day long for 55 in a 45 and running that yellow. Sometimes there are 3-4 cars out there working that intersection for easy money. You can even pay it online.

The real bitch of it is that I could have, and would have stopped, if my front tires at the time weren't old maypops on the wear bars. That $150 setback kept me from buying a $150 pair of H rated General Altimax HPs for another couple months, leading to a great many more mid intersection hydroplanes in the cold fall rain.

I-75 in northern FL, in college, heading back to college in ATL from Daytona where one of my buddies from high school went to college. Decided to get home early, was doing 105 in a 70 since there wasn't a soul on the road. Ended up passing a small clearing in the woods, cop sitting in the back, I didn't even bother waiting until he pulled out to pull over. He literally rolled up about a mile in the breakdown lane with his lights on, his first words to me: "Thank you for stopping, I've never had anyone do that for me before..." I got lucky he knocked the ticket down from 105/70 + wreckless + arrest + car tow to 90 in a 70 which was something like $150, never ended up on my record.

On the Garden Stae Parkway in NJ Northbound at about 1 AM. I'm in the right lane and a car is overtaking me on the left. Come over a small rise and there's a car pulling out from the shoulder and doing about 10 mph. Ihave no room to the left and as I brake heavily, I head to the shoulder to avoid the car that just pulled out. My car (81 Escort)spins and gets t-boned by a Caddilac that was behind me. When the SP arrives, I get a ticket for careless driving. The Trooper asks if my car is drivable and I ask him if he can shine his flashlight on the car so I can see the damage. It is about 5 degrees F and he refuses. I get to drive home 100 miles with no rear 1/4 window and the right rear wheel toed in about 30 degrees. I fought the ticket and won.

Aside from parking tickets, I've only ever gotten four, and none of them were a big deal.

Fix-it ticket in Ontario for no front plate. Got that waived by installing said front plate (with zip ties.)
In Germany, 40 km/h in a 30 zone, twice. €15, no points. Stupid camera tickets. (Just try doing under 30 km/h! It's not possible!) I paid them.
€50 fine for failing to cancel my sticker after taking off the insurance. (Car was parked.) Stupid German law I had no idea about. No points.

I guess I'm a lightweight. I intend to keep it that way.

I haven got a ticket yet (knock on wood) despite my Civic having blacked out windows. I got a warning driving my friend's 300ZX. Cop said I crossed the middle line.

97 in a 65...then started to run...then decided not too. Should've kept the hammer down. That one was close to a month's salary at the time when all was said & done.

There is one worse that I won't put in writing.

Best one I got away with: Averaged 120mph from Gainesville FL to Ft. Pierce. Had to get there in time for probation for a seperate offense.

Cited (falsely) for wrong way on a campus traffic circle. On a bicycle. Still irks me.

Later, they (Kampus Kops)stole my car from a legitmate parking spot. When I called to report my car missing, they said they had towed one just like it. The tow truck driver marked where he got it from - in the lot that exactly matched my permit. No explanation or apology, either. No money changed hands, but I missed a half-day of work sorting it out. Big bucks for me at the time. The Kampus Kops still acted like it was my fault.

When I was 18-19 I took my Prelude Si out for a test run on a local road (50 mph limit). Pulled it up to 120 mph+ and then backed off. A few miles later I see the flashing lights behind me. Officer asks me how fast I was going. In my head I'm thinking "Depends, where did you see me at?". If I say I was going the speed limit he might throw the book at me if he caught me at 120. So I say "70?", waiting for his reaction... He then proceeds to write me up for 70 in a 50. Hindsight wonders if I confessed to a higher speed than he saw me at, or if he was being cool and knew it was a 100+.

Didn't dry out long enough at The Crossroads (three dry counties, one wet) before heading back to Starkville, Mississippi, caught in a roadblock. Blew a perfect .010 (limit in MS at the time). Best story is what happened afterwards. The cops don't want to leave the roadblock long enough to take people to jail one-by-one, so they try to fill up a car before heading out. Out of the five of us, me and one other doesn't give the officer any E36 M3. There's one guy who tried blowing out of the other side of his mouth, one guy who opened up a can of confiscated beer (in the back of the patrol car) and drinks it, and the last one..

Cop starts driving, decides to pack his pipe. Weaves all over the road. Last guy says, "If you're driving like that, what are we here for?"

Get to the famous Starkville City Jail, there's only three slots left (this was before overcrowding was legal). Call the county, no dice. Call neighboring counties/towns, nope. Cop takes me & the other guy who didn't hassle him into a room, closes the door, and says, "Okay, you're still being charged, you'll still have to go to court, but..if you've got somebody who can pick you up you won't have to spend the night in jail." I call a friend of mine, she comes to get me. Turns out she's so high that we have to change drivers as soon as we're around the corner. Life is so weird..

Tell em bout Starkville, Johnny.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIFQkbhTIGk

poopshovel wrote: There is one worse that I won't put in writing.

I have one of those. It really sucked. Changed the whole way I drive.

A lot of these stories illustrate what my early experiences taught me (1) I was probably lucky to have lived through it. (2) Poking a bear with a stick is a bad idea. (3) No need to be an idiot on the road. There are plenty of legal events to drive your car fast in. Many of which you can read about in GRM.

I drive very moderately on the road now. Probably why I haven't had a citation in 30 years.

I used to get pulled over all the time in San Antonio, TX. Most of the time I could have swore it was just because I had red Asian sports car ('86 RX-7) and once I was proven right when a semi passed me doing 70 in a 55 and I got pulled over.

He was in the fast lane and I was in the slow lane, but the ticket wasn't very expensive at all so I figured it wasn't worth the fight..

Good times...

poopshovel wrote: Best one I got away with: Averaged 120mph from Gainesville FL to Ft. Pierce. Had to get there in time for probation for a seperate offense.

Heh, about 14 years ago I needed to come up to Gainesville to check on our property, as a friend had called to let us know the gate had been taken off it's hinges, and no one was living on the 40+acres up here at the time. So sitting around with a few friends on my one day off, I mention I REALLY need to go up and check it out, we were living down around Tampa at the time. So they offered to ride up with me. Cool, can make a day of it, heck I even paid for the gas. 6 of us total, all on 900 or larger racer wanna be bikes (crotch rockets) hop on I75 heading north, next thing I know we're playing around, pushing each other to go a little bit faster(chatterbox's). By the time we hit the Dade city exit we were pushing north of 130, often more like north of 150. Made it to Gainesville in less than an hour from the time we got on the interstate, with a pair of gas stops thrown in. The one highway patrol P71 we passed didn't even blink at us as we passed him, I glanced down when I saw him and I was indicating 168ish at the time. We took the back roads home with a little less hooning around, just to play it safe.

Hindsight wonders if I confessed to a higher speed than he saw me at, or if he was being cool and knew it was a 100+.

Confuscius say: "Cop neva being cool. Only trying to get you to admit guilt. Why? Because lack of evidence!"

BWWWWEEEESSSHHHHHH!

Dollars to sticky piggy doughnuts: He wasn't running radar, just saw you going "fast," and lucked out when you admitted guilt.

poopshovel wrote:

Hindsight wonders if I confessed to a higher speed than he saw me at, or if he was being cool and knew it was a 100+.

Confuscius say: "Cop neva being cool. Only trying to get you to admit guilt. Why? Because lack of evidence!" BWWWWEEEESSSHHHHHH!

TRUTH!!!! I've gotten out of two tickets in the past two years with this. Just say nothing, be polite, don't argue, say thanks for the ticket and ask for a court date. Show up and it's his word against yours. Neither of mine showed up for court, I had given them nothing to say I had done it. BTW at least around here that little radio on their shoulder they keep playing with, is a mic to the dash recorder. So if you say it, it's on tape. And no, they won't tell you that till you get to court.

Isn't it illegal to record someone without their permission?

Got lots.....One of the worst, Monroe Georgia - 1970 442 Convertible, 3am (not drinking!), Clocked 104 mph thru a Stop sign wearing nothing but boxer shorts.

Argo1 wrote: A lot of these stories illustrate what my early experiences taught me (1) I was probably lucky to have lived through it. (2) Poking a bear with a stick is a bad idea. (3) No need to be an idiot on the road. There are plenty of legal events to drive your car fast in. Many of which you can read about in GRM. I drive very moderately on the road now. Probably why I haven't had a citation in 30 years.

Mine is because the National Speed Limit (55mph) was repealed. I had a bunch of 75-80 in a 55. I still drive just as fast, it's just that they don't even look at me now.

nicksta43 wrote: I 'm amazed I survived my youth.

You aren't the only one amazed at surviving our youth. Of course, I'm kinda paying for my youth now with a bad right shoulder, left wrist, both knees with the left the worse and left ankle and hip. Walk with a limp most of the time and can't run without extreme pain, even wearing a knee brace. I forsee a cane in my not so distant future and sometimes wonder how much longer I can drive a manual transmission.

What is this "Warning" thing that cops seem to give away to everyone except me. If I get pulled over I'm getting the paper no matter how polite I am. I seem to get a ticket about every 7 years on average. The last one was the most annoying, still upset about it and it was a couple years ago now. Driving the Miata down 41A from Ft Campbell to Hopkinsville, KY to the hotel I was staying at after work (was there on business). Traffic kinda heavy and doing the speed limit of 55, look in my rear view mirror and only see grill of a pickup truck loaded down with work supply. I mean literally 3 feet off my bumper and won't back off, even tries to egg me to go faster. Stays that close when I speed up a little. I see a space in the next lane a little ahead of me and step on it and dive into that space and slow back down to the speed limit. A mile down the road I see lights behind me and pull over, right behind the pickup that was tailgating me. KY HP said he clocked me at over 70 in a 55 and admitted to seeing what I did and why. Still wrote me up for 65 in a 55 and no points. I don't believe I went over 70 like he said as I never hit the infamous 67mph Miata shuffle that was present in my slightly modified Miata. Probably did do what he wrote on the ticket though so couldn't argue with that. Just peeved that I did it to get out of the way and only long enough to get out of the way of the tailgater and still paid for it. The only solice was the tailgater got one too.

One I got away with. . .

Pennsylvania, driving I-380 east at 0630 on a winter morning, carpooling with my friend I affectionately refer to as "Hoss". This section of I-380, in the early morning, is known as the Tobyhanna 500 because of thousands of DoD employees heading to Tobyhanna Army Depot at the same time. I'm driving down the interstate doing a consistant 70 mph with the flow of traffic, in the fast lane passing slower cars packing in the right lane. The whole time I have some Bob Costas pulling up on my bumper and backing off, then driving onto the left shoulder and back, over and over. I have patience, but Hoss on the other hand. . .

Hoss is former Airborne, 6'5", 300lbs and all upper body. Stature of a linebacker and looks the bastard child of Terry Bradshaw and Cale Yarborough. He rolls down his passenger window and sticks his linebackeresque torso out the window facing back, pumping the Double Polish One-Fingered Salute. At around the third pump, in the dark of the morning, the gumballs go off. I have a distinct visual in my head of how big his eyes must have been at that moment.

I pull over.

One of our co-workers following close by and bearing witness to all these shinannigans said the trooper pulled in behind us, opened up his drivers door. . . left it open. . . ran. . . not walked. . . ran. . . around the front of his car over to the passenger side of mine. At which point he read Hoss the riot act with accompanying saliva shower. The whole time I'm focussed forward, fingernails imbedded into the steeringwheel. In closing he finished with, "NOW, CAREFULL PULLING OUT ONTO THE HI-WAY!"

Wait? What? No ticket? I have yet to see anybody getting a ticket on I-380 at this time in the morning. You see, at that time troopers are on the way back to the stables for shift change.

I, too, had never got a warning-- always the ticket-- until one night:

Got passed by another Mini on the the tollway in Houston. Well, I thought, let's play. Got the Cooper S to to a little over 90 and immediately the lights go on behind me. Almost like the other Mini was bait.

I pulled over. The Sargent introduced himself and told me he had clocked me at 85. I am ALWAYS super polite and cooperative with LE. I asked him if he would prefer to step to the passenger side of the vehicle since it made me nervous with him standing with his back to traffic whizzing by at 70+. We probably were both thinking about a brother officer that had been killed earlier in the week in a similar situation. He gave me a warning (just a small form with no carbon) and thanked me for my concern for his safety. It probably helped that I had a 100 Club sticker on the back (local police widow & orphan's fund).

The worst one I got:

I was about 20 years old and was headed south on US 63 from Columbia MO to Jeff City MO. I was ultimately headed to Rolla MO for my first day of college. It was probably 1am, no one else on the road, and I decide to make up some time.

I'm cruising along at 120 and pass one car that tucks in behind and we continue on for a bit. At some point, unbeknownst to me, this person pulls off and a Trooper has taken his place.

He pulls me over. As usual, I have my license etc. ready to go. He says he has been behind me for 2 miles and asks why I'm in such a hurry. I give him the story about school, 7am class, etc.. The exchange is very friendly.

Then it gets interesting. Growing up in Kansas City with parents on both the MO and KS sides, I had DLs from both states. Since I'm in MO I hand him the KS license (at the municiple level this worked great in the 90s as KCMO didn't communicate infractions to the cities on the KS side).

Turns out the highway patrol had better computers. He runs my info and gets back both of my driving records, one of which showed suspended. Needless to say, he takes me in for 120 in a 60 and a suspended license.

Since I was so nice during this exchange, he assures me that my car won't be towed so I can pick it up later. He stands by his word and a few hours later, after a pleasant conversation with my mother, the bail bondsman drops me off at my car and I get to Rolla in time for my 7am class.

This infraction ended up costing me about $3,000 in lawyer and court costs, but it was worth it to keep from going to jail for 6 months.

I'll post a couple of the ones where I should have been caught later.

in my younger years I lost my licenese 3 times, was arrested for speeding 2 times... been without (knock on wood) for 10 years now, wife has 2 tickets in the last 5 years.. we got new insurance and the adject told my wife she has a lead foot

My only speeding ticket was 55 in the 35 because I accelerated before the speed change, which happened half-way up a really steep hill. Happened in 2006 - clean driving ever since.

poopshovel wrote: Dollars to sticky piggy doughnuts: He wasn't running radar, just saw you going "fast," and lucked out when you admitted guilt.

It doesn't always work that way.....

I got a 75-in-a-55 ticket because a GSP officer paced me at his speed from about a half-mile back.

It was real early on a Sunday morning with very light traffic on I-20, going to an autocross with race tires in the hatch and SCCA stickers on the car. I was actually doing 95-plus when I luckily glanced in the mirror and glimpsed what appeared to be car with a light bar on the roof cresting a hill. The throttle lift at least got me down to a more "respectable" speed.

And that damned Escort detector never issued a beep.