Books that you'd like to see a movie of (that will never happen)

Ever read a book and thought that both (1) it would make a great movie, and (2) there's no way anyone would ever be able to make a movie of it?

I'll start this thread with Snow Crash.

Why it would make a great movie: This one is full of over the top action sequences, from skitching behind cars at triple digit speeds to insane fight scenes. And there's both a lot of cool gadgets and a detailed dystophian world that would be impressive to bring to life on the big screen. Just, please, don't make all the effects in Reality out of CGI - listen to reason, and save the CGI for the Metaverse. For that matter, in the Metaverse, you can intentionally cheap out and get away with plastic skin and other bad CGI. Not everyone can afford a custom avatar, after all.

Why this would be nearly impossible: The book is the size of Lord of the Rings. I don't see a market for this as a 10 hour movie like LOTR, and cutting it down to two and a half hours may turn it into an incoherent mess. Plus, it's going to be a casting department's nightmare. I'm drawing a blank on thinking of a well known lead to match Hiro's African / Korean ancestory, but there's probably an obscure actor out there who could get his big break with this movie. But where are you going to find a seven foot tall Aleut to play Raven?

What books have you read that you'd like to see a movie of, but know it's not going to work out?

The Art Of Racing In the Rain.....

I have a collection of short stories called the "Book of the Dead" and in it there's one particular story called "On the Far Side of the Cadillac Desert with Dead Folks" that I absolutely love!

A well done, gritty movie adapted from this story would be epic. A poorly done movie adapted from this story would be heart breaking. Keep Tom Cruise the hell away from it!!!

Some of the Jack Reacher novels would be cool, but you'd need a 6' 5" 220lb bad-ass lead actor to play Jack. Hollywood would do something stupid like put Tom Cruise in there instead, or Kevin James.

I'd like to see some of Richard Marcinko's early books made into movies, or at least an amalgam of his stories into a movie. The problem would be 1) the main character is an ugly slovak with a beard and 2) no love interest, just killing tangos.

Snow Crash was my first thought when I saw the thread title, and it was actually intended to be a movie in the first place. I don't think it's impossible but it's unlikely to go well, it would have to be at least 4 hours long. Maybe broken into 2 movies. I think the Metaverse should have graphics that aren't even good by today's standards - it would match both the book and the real-life equivalents that have come since.

People always listen to Reason

jimbob_racing wrote: The Art Of Racing In the Rain.....

They made that. It was called Marley and Me.

The Mission Earth Series By L Ron Hubbard. (Before he became a Scientology freak) I enjoyed the heck out of that series and always thought it would make a good Sci-Fi movie franchise.

bmw88rider wrote: The Mission Earth Series By L Ron Hubbard. (Before he became a Scientology freak) I enjoyed the heck out of that series and always thought it would make a good Sci-Fi movie franchise.

Wait, have you seen Battlefield Earth? It's the most unintentionally comic thing I've seen in years.

I've always wanted to see Atlas Shrugged and The Fountainhead as movies... and I'll continue to pretend that neither one was ever made.

I think William Gibson's Neuromancer and the rest of the Sprawl trilogy could be good movies, but they would just get it wrong, wrong, wrong. And their time has kind of come and gone.

The Amy Chronicles

Lynn Flewelling's books. Tamír Triad and The Nightrunner Series They share a fantasy world separated by 400 years, and there is 400 years of development and advancement. Think middle ages vs. Renaissance.

I had always thought to do it well, it couldn't be cut down to a movie, but rather a series. The only "network" that could do it without censoring it would be HBO or Showtime. And I was saying 5 years before HBO started Game of Thrones. So that's not going to happen now.

Of course it plays right in with the video game franchise (book was WAY better than the game): The Fall of Reach would be an awesome movie, might need to be a trilogy to get it all in though.

"The way to Dusty Death" by Allistair McClain (not sure of spelling). A gripping tale of drug smuggling set around the F1 circus back in the early 70s.

In reply to Kia_Racer:

Yeah, they made the big epics like Guns of Navarrone, but I always thought that The Way to Dusty Death would have made a good movie. Golden Gate would have been a good movie too, but there are plenty of similar scenarios.

Anything from William W. Johnstone's "Ashes" series. I nominate Adam Baldwin to play Ben Raines.

I'd love to see another Clive Cussler novel turned into a movie, but after the "Sahara" fiasco I'm sure that Clive has it written into his will that all movie rights are off the table for eternity. Sure Sahara took a few liberties with the story (I really wanted to see Abraham Lincoln sitting in that ship) but I thought Matthew McConaughey and Steve Zahn made a great Pitt & Giordino. And William H. Macy as Sandecker was perfect. And we're just going to forget "Raise The Titanic" ever existed....

Duke wrote: I've always wanted to see *Atlas Shrugged* and *The Fountainhead* as movies... and I'll continue to pretend that neither one was ever made.

Those could only have a chance of being good movies if they left a lot of fluff out from the books and toned down/glossed over the heavy-handed political stuff.

The books' only redeeming qualities are that some people find them ideologically agreeable, and that there is a half-decent story buried somewhere under that landfill of terribly-written objectivist fap material.

Lucifer's Hammer by Larry Niven, since my first answer was the start of the thread.

I liked Snow Crash enough to make a quote from the book my senior yearbook quote: "Jack the sound barrier, bring the noise."

When that quote comes from the internal monologue up of a cyborg doggie breaking his programming and actually exceeding the speed of sound running down a freeway, it illustrates why it would be a great movie and a bitch to make...

Jumper K. Balls wrote:

Yes, and the next one on your list.

JohnRW1621 wrote: The Amy Chronicles

I'm sure this could be arranged. Who will be the lead male, James Deen?

Snow Crash would be a great movie, if not somewhat confusing at times (like the book) because Stephenson jumped around a good bit and tosses the reader/viewer into the middle of things with little initial backstory on what happened to get there.

Neuromancer would be great too.

I'm rather looking forward to them finally getting Ready Player One out and seeing how they handle the OASIS parts (and the truly ridiculous amount of licensing).

EDIT: Also a bit YES PLEASE! to Good Omens, one of the funniest books I've read.

Another that crossed my mind was not a book, but a special 1 issue comic, Speeding Bullets. AKA, superman is batman. The child from Krypton fell to the Wayne family of Gotham. Although the part where Lex Luther becomes the joker can be omitted.

Many Scott Sigler books would make highly entertaining movies. He releases a lot of the audio books for free if you want a good listen. http://scottsigler.com/library/

Can I add one that WAS made, but didn't really look like the book except by title? World War Z. I still think it could have followed the book and been a decent movie. Without Brad Pitt hanging out of a helicopter saving the day.

Lucifer's Hammer would be good, but I am not sure it would be much different then any other world disaster movie.

I think Ringworld or The Mote in God's Eye would be interesting. Kind of large subjects though that would be hard to cover in a movie. The advent of decent character CGI does make the depiction of the alien races much easier though. Doing a reasonable depiction of a Puppeteer would have been almost impossible until recently:

Of course, Niven's Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex (basically a realistic physical analyis of Superman and Lois's sex life ) would make an entertaining short subject, but I suspect it might end up with an X rating.