My wife is one of the funniest people I know. And she loves april fools. And I, being the fool, have stared down the barrel of a well-executed joke too many times.
such as the time she lovingly and graciously made me a bowl of cereal after a tough day and waited until I was 3/4's finished to start hinting that the milk might not be what i expected (it was breast milk).
or when she made a fake email address (jimthehandyman@gmail.com or something like that) and started emailing me as jim, the neighbor handyman who broke two expensive windows replacing the trim but denied it, saying that the house must have settled, breaking them.
she/jim told me over a series of emails that my windows broke his window leveling tool and i owed him $100. she did it from the couch while i was 6' away on the computer growing increasingly angry and sharing my emotions and demanding of her to keep me from doing something i might regret.
so we are a few days away and i want to get her. not make her cry or anger her - at least not too much! - but more than a simple prank like syran wrapping the toilet or dumping a bucket of cold water in the shower.
ideas??
In order to properly execute psychological warfare, one must first know the enemy.
We will need more of a profile. What are her interests? What are her concerns? Is there something she is concerned you may or may not do (e.g. buy race cars)?
The nice thing about using this site, there is almost certainly someone here willing to participate so you can set something up that you can make completely bullet proof as to if you are involved (as in something happening while you are standing there doing nothing).
Seconding Aircooled. We need more intel. I'm down to help too. I can do Zoom meetings, phone calls, whatever.
84FSP
UberDork
3/27/23 7:51 p.m.
I like where this is going, carry on.
Have someone drop off your "new" race car when you're not around and can't answer your phone. There is money owing, of course. And naturally she can't know about the car in advance.
Seems appropriate after Jim the handyman.
How was the cereal? It's all breast milk, really...
j_tso
Dork
3/27/23 8:02 p.m.
^^ seconding new race car purchase
Got a buddy with a Lemons or Champcar? If it's too fancy or over the top junky that might give it away.
Good points! Intel is needed
concerns: doesn't really have any/many which is amazing.... she does think (and isn't wrong) that I have too many cars so likely wouldn't be instantly stoked if I brought home one but was supportive of me bidding on an old v8 swapped jaguar that didn't run.
Plus i want to be careful I don't poison any future purchases by playing with her emotions here...
she is concerned that I have too many projects and not enough time (definitely true). house, car, etc.
losing a kid (as in misplacing/forgetting) would be a concern.
I just had an idea....
I might be working that day or night. (Stunt driving in a car chase on a feature) Sometimes, although not often, I will call or even FaceTime while I'm doing something like this. I could call her and stage an accident over the phone with my buddies playing parts over the radio, acting like they're coming in to help, "oh no, are you ok? He's not responding... get him out! Someone call 911 etc etc"
hmmmmm. I just need to do it when the kids aren't there as it would freak them out... There's potential here!
edit:
adding this link for possible future use
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qhPuOiZLM-4
Ahhh dropping off the new race car! That's a real potential winner. But it needs to be a crap can of the highest level. I need to see if I can find one!
NOHOME
MegaDork
3/27/23 8:12 p.m.
Letter from the bank detailing new interest rate hikes. Depends on who does finances.
Don't do what I did. Showed her my new Motorcycle that a friend dropped off for the occasion. Wife is an ICU nurse who had just spend the last 12 hours parting out a human after a bike crash. Ha Ha...Couch sleeping, expensive dinner and designer chocolates ensued.
Borrow a giant dog or a Porsche and yell "Surprise". Who knows, either one might stick , and that wold not be all bad.
In reply to jfryjfry :
That was my thought, but didn't know if it would go too far. You are in like the perfect industry for April fools.
If you have too many hobbies, have someone drop off something other than a race car that would be an even more expensive and preferably bizarre hobby.
Like a horse.
If you can get someone to show up with a horse, and expect her to have to pay for it and start arguing about where to put it, that would be golden.
If not something living, maybe a boat.
In reply to Beer Baron :
She might want to keep the horse, that's a gamble.
Do you know an attractive, slightly pregnant, young lady who could show up on your doorstep? You mention that you'll be away and I assume hard to reach.
In retrospect, this might cause real grief.
Mariachi Ambush - Hire a Mariachi band. Sneak them into your garage or the laundry room or something. As soon as she enters, they begin serenading with ranchero music at full volume.
Change her ringtone to Baby Shark.
He is in El Segundo, right near LAX in Los Angeles (according to his profile).
Anyone near by have either an obviously really expensive, or really scary looking race car on a trailer?
Drive up to house when he is not there and she is, knock on door (car on trailer very obvious in background) looking for him because the gate to the warehouse he wanted his car delivered to is locked and he won't answer the phone (maybe during a shoot). How did you get this address? This is where the payment came from.
I like simple pranks.
Does her car have a trailer hitch on it? Slip a large frozen shrimp into the end of the tube and wait for it to mature.
Unless she parks in the garage.
Keith Tanner said:
Oh, I like the goats.
Oh no... SHEEP! Tell her it's your new business venture... Lawn Shearers!
imgon
HalfDork
3/27/23 9:47 p.m.
I once hid my wife's car and left cryptic hints as to where to look for it. We had a tall deck on one side of the house and I parked it under the deck. the clues sent her out the other side of the house and around the neighborhood. It took her about 20 minutes to get back to our yard and find it. Depending on how old your kids are, they may be able to assist. It was a little lame but she still talks about it almost 30 years later
I am happy to help my friend. However cant do it on April 1 .
Has it been over a year since I was over at the house?
