Customer states, vibration when barking.
Sometimes, repair orders make me laugh...
Customer states, vibration when barking.
Sometimes, repair orders make me laugh...
Get the customer a bark collar?
Customer states: car sits high in the nose with our springs. Engine is removed.
In reply to Keith Tanner :
How'd they fit a Miata in their nose at all?!
In reply to thatsnowinnebago :
Im laughing my ass off right now because this reminds me of something dumb a friend said back in high school. Group of us was hanging out, scrolling through rotten.com (if anyone remembers that) and we come across this x ray of a guy with a whole potato and fully intact jar of jelly lodged in his rectum. While the rest of us are freaking out ("Aww, dude, that's NASTY. What the berkeley?!?!?" ect) my buddy just stares at it blankly, then after a long pause goes "Well how'd he swallow the whole jar of jelly?"
Customer states: Engine makes noise when it's running.
Customer states: A button doesn't work
Customer states: Bog after 5400 rpm (in 5th or 6th gear)
Customer states: Driver side door hing does has become unattached
Customer state: car start would go into gear turn off attempted to start would up wait a few min. but start right back up and ran find check and advise
Copied word for word, and yes, trying to read that one made my head hurt !
In reply to underpowered :
The problem with that is usually operator error between the keyboard. Whether that is the service advisor or the call center making appointments.
I ran and later owned alignment shops for about a decade, 1980 to 1989.
I had a good, repeat customer for a good portion of this time who was, well, a really big woman.
REAL big, like 400 - 500lbs. Really.
She would complain that her car, a big full size Lincoln of mid '70's vintage, would pull to the left. I would drive it, no pull.
Next day the same complaint. I finally tweaked the caster so it had a slight pull to the right. She drove it and said it was perfect.
Then her husband came in complaining the car pulled to the right. And if they were both in it with him driving, it pulled hard to the right.
That was an awkward conversation to say the least.
In reply to SaltyDog :
Did you get out of that without getting punched by either person?
In reply to SaltyDog :
There's a local lore about a similar situation - only it involved the horn coming on sporadically. I'll let you piece the rest of it together...
In reply to Rufledt :
Barely!
I actually had her sit in the back seat and move from one side of the car to the other to prove why the car would pull,
I did tell her that it was a common issue even though I honestly think that was the only time I had it happen.
When I was 19 I had a job at a Lincoln Mercury dealership. I overheard a conversation between the service writer and a customer. Customer said that the leaner was broken. Without missing a beat the writer said why don't you show me exactly what is wrong. When he came back I asked him what the hell is a leaner? He said that he had no idea when the customer said that so he wanted to see it. It is the folding armrest between the front seats in a town car
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're for.
P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
And the best one for last.
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.
In reply to aircooled :
That's been around since the Wright Brothers. Never fails to make me LOLZ.
SaltyDog said:I ran and later owned alignment shops for about a decade, 1980 to 1989.
I had a good, repeat customer for a good portion of this time who was, well, a really big woman.
REAL big, like 400 - 500lbs. Really.
She would complain that her car, a big full size Lincoln of mid '70's vintage, would pull to the left. I would drive it, no pull.
Next day the same complaint. I finally tweaked the caster so it had a slight pull to the right. She drove it and said it was perfect.
Then her husband came in complaining the car pulled to the right. And if they were both in it with him driving, it pulled hard to the right.
That was an awkward conversation to say the least.
If your weight is causing noticeable tire wear issues on your Lincoln Continental, that's a perfect time to invest in a gym membership. 
I wonder if she later upgraded to an air ride Mark Viii
SaltyDog said:I ran and later owned alignment shops for about a decade, 1980 to 1989.
I had a good, repeat customer for a good portion of this time who was, well, a really big woman.
REAL big, like 400 - 500lbs. Really.
She would complain that her car, a big full size Lincoln of mid '70's vintage, would pull to the left. I would drive it, no pull.
Next day the same complaint. I finally tweaked the caster so it had a slight pull to the right. She drove it and said it was perfect.
Then her husband came in complaining the car pulled to the right. And if they were both in it with him driving, it pulled hard to the right.
That was an awkward conversation to say the least.
Dude with fat wife, and fat daughter, needed the conversation to tell the fat daughter to sit behind Dad, not behind Mom.
Think of the cross-weights, corner to corner, on that boat of a Lincoln. Yikes!
In reply to SaltyDog :
i had a similar situation with a largish gentleman, i had him sit in it when i finally figured out how big he was.
after realigning with him , it was fine..
When I was working at one of the local auto repair shops as an "LOF Technician" AKA Shop Bitch, one of my repair orders said "Ride with Ester, listen to the noise".
It was an elderly woman in a Buick. As I just did oil changes and minor stuff, one of the mechanics had to ride with her. It was a bad rear strut.
Our service writer would just put down whatever the customer said, verbatim. Most of the time it was gibberish barely resembling English.
Customer states they lost electricity and have no heat. Wants to know if she should keep the water running a bit in every faucet so pipes won't freeze. Ah OK, you have a well and a pump that runs on electricity. How long do you think that water is going to run?
In reply to tr8todd :
Opening the tap will cause the water pressure to drop as some water will backflow down the well feed pipe, thereby reducing the water level in the housepipes. If they do freeze they are not as likely to burst. Once the power comes back on, the well may require priming before water will flow again, depending on the depth of the well, but it might prevent significant damage. 
Unintended benefits
Customer states: intermittant wipers only work intermittantly. I actually had this issue on my old caravan. They would swipe once and then stop working for like 5 minutes. Then swipe 3 or 4 more times and quit altogether. Unfortunately sold it before fixing the issue.
In reply to EastCoastMojo :
Getting rid of it seems to be the traditional way of fixing Caravans.
In reply to Appleseed :
I miss that turbo van.
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