Did I faux pas?

jstand wrote: In reply to G_Body_Man: I find it interesting how people without children seem to know the most about child care. I would not be particularly receptive to someone without children providing unsolicited advice about what is appropriate or not appropriate for my child. It's the automotive equivalent of someone that has never driven a car, giving driving instructions to the guy that just finished his autocross run.

+1000

my kids have been to adult parties with alcohol since birth(they're 5 and 2). my friends have always been cool to them and we generally leave anywhere early because they're little. my intent as a parent is to have a little fun with my friends, but if the kids get upset and tired we're out of there so as not to be those people with the crying kid.

also, people around me know i tend to despise children that have not been borne of my own loins. those people know it's not my duty to play with, attend to, or pay attention to their child. "oh isn't he cute?" no your kid looks like a berkeleying alien, lady, and it wouldn't scream if you would pay attention to it instead of your stupid phone. as a parent, i do not feel this weird bond with other people just because they have kids. my brother in law, king of pawning his kids off on other people, tried to pawn his kid's E36 M3 diaper off on me once and he got the message when i shot him the "get berkeleyed" look while saying nothing until he sighed and changed it himself.

i don't think the dick move is not going because there is going to be a (probably quiet sleeping or nursing, and you're missing the opportunity to see boob) baby there, the faux pas was the reason given true or not.

jstand wrote: In reply to G_Body_Man: I find it interesting how people without children seem to know the most about child care. I would not be particularly receptive to someone without children providing unsolicited advice about what is appropriate or not appropriate for my child. It's the automotive equivalent of someone that has never driven a car, giving driving instructions to the guy that just finished his autocross run.

Hey, I was only trying to phrase it in a way that would have made the OP look like less of a blatant shiny happy person.

It's a lot nicer to say "let the baby get some rest" than to say "I actually hate children." I've been to many mature social gatherings, some with very young children and some without. I typically find the latter to be noticeably less awkward for many party-goers, particularly if an inebriated individual says something rather offensive.

Sometimes an opinion made of BS and presented in a kind manner is a lot more palatable than an opinion made entirely of truth and presented in a tactless manner, and if the OP were so adamant in their opinion, he should have mulled over his phrasing and presentation a little more.

I don't have any business telling anyone how to raise their kid, and very few people on the internet should. As many of us know, there's nothing worse than a bench racer telling you what you did wrong on your last run so I'm not going to be that bench racer.

I've gone to the brewery with loud live music and people bring their babies. Some people have no sense, I don't particularly like kids and babys but I wouldn't let that keep me from a party. I feel sorry for parents but in the age of planned parenthood having kids is a choice and you shouldn't plan on bringing them to late night events.

benzbaronDaryn wrote: I've gone to the brewery with loud live music and people bring their babies. Some people have no sense, I don't particularly like kids and babys but I wouldn't let that keep me from a party. I feel sorry for parents but in the age of planned parenthood having kids is a choice and you shouldn't plan on bringing them to late night events.

This is the equivalent of "you had a kid, your life is over"

Or you can be the cool parents and expose your kids to life experiences. Mine have been to concerts and racetracks, they have hearing protection and carry themselves well in public.

The choice to have kids doesn't mean I'm choosing that my only social interaction will be with wine drinking housewives on playdates and milfs checking me out at the grocery store. Do we go to the party? Yes. Do we leave before the raucous stuff starts? Indeed. Have my kids had dinner at the bar at 10pm? Yep.

Milf's checking me out at the grocery store is one of the best parts of being a stay at home dad.

mazdeuce wrote: Milf's checking me out at the grocery store is one of the best parts of being a stay at home dad.

I have no experience with kids of my own but I have a lot of friends with kids who bring them out all the time and never remember one of them causing me to have a bad time. Maybe if one of them finished the scotch or something but otherwise the go more or less unnoticed.

In reply to Wall-e:

Right.

I'm considerably more likely to ditch a party if "that guy" shows up, than if "those people" bring their kids.

I hate babies but very much enjoy little humans because it makes me feel strong and intelligent.

They are also great to have around when you have a "hold my beer and watch this" moment, although it's followed "and don't you dare drink that either!"

Man im glad i dont have too raise my kids per the rules in a grm thread. Some of these replys are hilarious! My kids experience alot of things, becoming a dad didnt ruin my social life, just slowed it down.

mazdeuce wrote: Milf's checking me out at the grocery store is one of the best parts of being a stay at home dad.

I miss those days. That little blonde terror was a chick magnet.

In reply to pheller:

I've never had to fight my way out of a bar because a friend's drunken toddler pushed a biker into a jukebox.

EvanR wrote: WTF did I do wrong??

You blabbed Quaid, you blabbed about Mars!

But seriously, I don't think there was a fuax pas here. You had a reason for not going and you told him. No biggie. I think your buddy probably thought it was a stupid reason not to attend a party (and frankly I'm kinda in agreement with him.) and is more upset that you couldn't get past the one 3 month old to come hang out for an evening, than he is that you told him the reason you're bowing out.

Now if it was like ten 3 year olds in attendance I could definitly see wanting to skip the thing. But one 3 month old isn't as big of a deal as you're making it out to be. My kids 11 now but when he was 3-4 and I had to be around other kids his age, I hated it.

Honestly if the music is loud enough I need earplugs it is irresponsible to bring baby. My hearing is kind of pugged, bringing a six month baby to a show is bad form. A dinner party is different than that.